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Choire

08/17/07 02:30PM

Filed to: brooke astor's funeral

"The homily was just delivered. 'She charmed one member of the royal family to whom I introduced her, saying, "I'm 95, sir, and I've never had a facelift." I've also seen her taken up in the embrace of an African-American janitor....' Okay now Rubenstein's or some lady's phone just rang. Oh yeah: When Bloomberg came in, he greeted every cop outside. Bloomberg for President! Now the New York 400 are kneeling and reciting the Lord's Prayer. Crazy Radar reporter won't stand up during hymns! Heathen! Ah, now the Marines are taking out the coffin.... and the coffin is going into the hearse. Bagpipers are playing."

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Schadenfrau Choire 08/17/07 05:09PM

I went to go have a gander at the funeral crowd and found a nice spot on the church steps, sandwiched between a homeless man and a few gay/German tourists. Various European types stopped to inquire about the scene, but understood neither "philanthropist" nor "socialite." They were able to comprehend "rich lady," though.

The highlight came when the homeless man (likely a Vietnam vet) shouted his recognition of Henry Kissinger. "That sure is Kissinger," I said, and the man made a fast break into the crowd. My colleague and I cheered him on until he was blocked by a swarm of cops and disappeared from view.

Atelier Choire 08/18/07 12:24AM

Two things:

@josh speed: Dick Cheney gives over 90% of his total annual income to charities every year, and has done so since taking office (about $5-6 million each year) so he has Brooke beat on that one, but you never hear about it, because he doesn't make a media spectacle of himself.

And second, why the hell are the Marines carrying her out? I don't get that connection.

josh speed Choire 08/17/07 03:10PM

Yeah, Mrs. Astor was a class act. 20$ million to the poor, the museums, the zoos. Someone who had money and who actually believed in spreading it around. Her kind will not come this way again, soon.

lovely nigerienne Choire 08/18/07 12:45PM

What a saint. She hugged a negro. And not just any negro. A male one AND a working class one. Santo!