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In an unlikely celestial confluence that saw the collision of the A-listiest of conscience-bearing Hollywood marquee idols with the synthetic-butter- substitute -hawking former star of Acapulco H.E.A.T., In Touch Weekly is reporting that a disagreement erupted between George Clooney and Fabio at Madeo Friday night, nearly bringing the two men to fisticuffs:

Fabio and a group of women, including a professional photographer, were sitting at a table next to George and his girlfriend, Sarah Larson.

According to numerous eyewitnesses, George suspected the woman was snapping photos of him and Sarah, so he asked her to stop. "I thought you were a nice guy," Fabio said to George as he approached the table. "Stop being a diva." Those were apparently fighting words, because George stood up and the fight turned physical!

The In Touch website refers us to the magazine at that point for what happened next, meaning until we get a chance to swing over to the nearest grocery store, we'll never know if our vision of a brutal hunk-on-hunk melée, in which an hysterical Clooney lept onto his adversary's back, taking vicious bites of the Avon Books covermodel's face and neck and yanking out wads of shoulder-length hair until the Michael Clayton star was tossed into a passing dessert cart, actually came to pass.