This image was lost some time after publication.

As you impatiently listen to the clock tick off the seconds until your Thanksgiving holiday, distract yourself from your daydreams of stuffing and candied yams with a look at the weekend's box office numbers:

1. Beowulf - $28.1 million
That Beowulf's opening weekend finished more than $40 million behind the blockbuster debut of 300 confirms what we'd already suspected: that a single, CGI-sculpted Ray Winstone sixpack, even when supplemented by a gilded, digitally bazoomed Angelina Jolie, simply cannot compete with an entire battalion's worth of glistening Spartan washboards. The next time director Robert Zemeckis decides to break out his motion-capture technology, he may want to find a few hundred more doughy English actors onto which he can impose abdominal perfection.

2. Bee Movie - $14.3 million
Once Jerry Seinfeld's risky foray into the feature world passes the coveted nine-figure box office milestone this coming weekend, expect the vindicated comedian to take out a full-page ad in the trades trumpeting the accomplishment, in which Seinfeld, again donning his Cannes bee suit, extends a defiant middle finger towards the reader over a headline declaring: "I TOOK A JOKE I TOLD SPIELBERG OVER DINNER AND MADE $100 MILLION WITH IT. SUCK IT, HOLLYWOOD. I HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO PROVE TO YOU."

3. American Gangster - $13.218 million
The next step in Russell Crowe and Denzel Washington's on-screen partnership will be, we hope, a buddy comedy. Dare we dream that someone (read: Brian Grazer) can find a way to put them into a remake of Lethal Weapon or 48 Hours?

4. Fred Claus - $12 million
Vince Vaughn is said to be very interested in working with Beowulf's Robert Zemeckis on a future project, intrigued that the director's lazy-actor-slimming technology might allow him to once again revert to his The Break-Up weight without suffering any career consequences.

5. Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium - $10.025 million
Unfortunately for Fox, the irresistible smell of cake they'd hoped would linger in potential ticket-buyers' olfactory memories for months seems to have long faded, resulting in a weak opening for their whimsical family film.