It's In the Low Thirties Outside, Do You Know Where Your Crotch Is?—M4W—26
What the red robin is to spring or the Shagbark Hickory's brilliant flaming foliage is to autumn, dirty Craigslist postings are to winter. Every year near the first snow, the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist positively bristles with cold young men and women (but almost entirely men, and some of those women are also men!) looking to be warmed up. This usually involves some amount of sexual contact with strangers or as one 34-year-old man put it, "IT'S COLD OUT-LETS RUB OUR HOT BODIES TOGETHER TO KEEP WARM." I've always relied on the radiator, a good pair of slippers and tea but hey, what do I know?
Another gentleman is stuck at home, it's cold and he's bedridden from an injury. (Worse: He's bedridden in the Bronx.) "I'm home alone with a sprained ankle and a swollen throbbing hard [thing]. I need a horny woman who can come and at least take care of my [thing]."
It is a commute but ladies, "My [thing] is about to bust. I will pay for your transportation both ways." (That would make you a whore, by the way.)
