Score one for power publicist Mike Sitrick: he's managed to get new client Joe"Girls Gone Wild" Francis profiled not entirely unsympathetically in the Sunday Style section. Joe's still stuck in jail, in spite of having a ton of money and also a ton of friends like Quincy Jones and Greta Van Susteren who don't think he belongs there. He's being held in Reno for tax evasion, but he also faces other charges in Florida that are more along the lines of what you'd expect if you're familiar with his history of being rapey, reporter-assaulty, and Richard Johnson-friendy. But in spite of being given a bully pulpit to drum up sympathy, Joe can't seem to make his cause seem just.

He "says he walked into jail with pills and cash because he was not searched and didn't know better," and he also "argues this is all payback for defying the power structure in Bay County with his First Amendment lawsuit." Ok, totally convinced!

Maybe Joe will use some of his downtime to hone his new website, which includes the most unconvincing open letter of all time. There's more crazy in it than can be easily explained, but here's how it concludes. "It might be a stretch to say that I'm just your average Joe, but as you explore this site, I think you'll come to find that my desires, dreams and disappointments aren't terribly different from your own."