Bizarro unicorn-slaying restaurateur Jeffrey Chodorow is closing down his horrendous restaurant at the Gansevoort Hotel and replacing it with another horrendous restaurant at the Gansevoort Hotel! In March, reports FloFab, Ono, that weird fusion place that never made sense, is going to be replaced by a steakhouse called Maxim Steak, a partnership with Maxim magazine. It's a magabrand made edible! Also probably a bad idea.

In November, Chodorow told Doree, Maxim Steak was "an intelligent steakhouse for intelligent people," which means to him that "a very female-friendly steakhouse, with a sexy environment." That does sound intelligent but also kinda familiar! In fact, it sounds just like that shitshow of a place STK which is literally steps away from the Gansevoort.

Chodorow meanwhile swears he'll resurrect Ono in "another location." Though Fabricant doesn't explicitly say it (c'mon, that lady is pure class) we're betting it'll go into that restaurant deathtrap that Chodorow's ill-fated Wild Salmon so recently occupied. That, as noted, passed quietly into oblivion as the clock struck midnight on December 31st. Bronzed spermatazoic salmon should be flooding the market any minute now.