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"Dear men of Craigslist, just fucking fuck me already" is a sincerely filthy guide by an anonymous, NSA-seeking lady. Sexual frustration must make for wordiness. I've excerpted her at iPhone length.

  • Most women like to be fucked, and fucked well. I am a raging feminist bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on fucking my throat from the inside out.
  • Learn to respect the clit. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt.
  • It's OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are fucking a ninja. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly.
  • Do not bitch about condoms. LEARN to come with one on.
  • Take charge. I've been fucked by a very aggressive, manly guy, and I've been... well, fucked is the wrong term here. I've been penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to when I'm ready for my fill?

(Photo of Vanessa from Craigslist)