John Mayer Harnesses The Power Of The Internet To Lash Out At A Clingy Ex
First John Mayer started to grow on us (a little bit) with his skills handling the TMZ paparazzi and voracious autograph seekers, then he won us over (okay, a lot) when we saw him jogging on a yacht wearing green Borat butt floss tightly wound across his nearly perfect buttocks. And now, having penned a giant Fuck You to one of his exes online, he's officially convinced us that we were correct in falling head over heels for the guy after witnessing his rendition of "Chocolate Rain" on Best Week Ever. But back to the story at hand! Earlier this week, John had the following to say to Jessica Simpson one of his anonymous ex-girlfriends:
"Dear Ex Lover. Perhaps you didn't understand the last time I told you to stop contacting me, so I'll do my best to spell it out for you. I do not wish to have you in my life anymore. I don't know how much more clear I can be about it. It would serve you best to move on with your life and find someone who can put up with you, because I'm done trying."
After news of this message landed his name on the gossip pages today, Mayer has done an about face and is now currently claiming that the online passive aggression wasn't an actual Fuck You to an actual person, but merely "a writing technique called 'deceptive resolution'...I call it 'I wish you were here so I could tell you to leave.'" Gee, thanks for clearing that up for us! And, in turn, we thank you for officially making us think you're simply the kinda hot famewhore with one hell of an O Face we always suspected you were.
[Photo Credit: Splash]