Hipster Kickballer Arrested for Brandishing a Sword in Macy's
In case you're not familiar, hundreds of hipsters gather every Sunday in Williamsburg to innocently have fun playing sports with their friends, drink beer, and act the fool. But sometimes often, fights break out—the Brooklyn Kickball league is infamous for penning overlong, entertaining letters. The Post informs us (since when are they on the kickball beat?) that last weekend, en route to his kickball game, yet another rogue hipster kickballer got in trouble. He was arrested!
29-year-old Lawrence Jackson, a player on the kickball team Los Piratas Mechanicos (the Robot Pirates), was acting the fool up in Macy's Herald Square department store. Specifically:
A rabble-rousing kickball player for a recreational team called the Pirates was busted yesterday for brandishing a swashbuckler's sword in the middle of Macy's Herald Square, cops said.
Jackson and his [eight months pregnant] girlfriend said he was carrying the sword for fun on the way to a game and that it was nothing more than a prop befitting his team's zany image - but cops said his explanation didn't cut it.
"He didn't think there was anything wrong with it," said Police Officer Richard Perrone, who responded after frightened shoppers called security. "He thought it was a toy. But it's not a toy. It's sharp."
That's the first and last time that "sharp" will be used to reference a hipster kickballer. Dude also had some weed on him, as well as a larger water gun. Take it from me: Central Booking is a bitch on the weekends, especially holidays. He's probably still there!
The Post added that the Robot Pirates team "occasionally wear drawn-on mustaches."