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There's a question that's been troubling us all—perhaps on an unconscious level—and poor Heather Locklear's predicament has brought it to the attention of two of the world's finest philosophers: The Daily News' folksy addiction experts Dave and Bill. So why do famous people spend huge amounts of money on rehab, only to continue getting bombed? It's their "dangerously inflated egos," apparently, which stand in the way of "the healing powers of anonymity and group morale" enjoyed by people with regular-sized egos at 12-step programs.

Nor do spoiled, privacy conscious celebs tend to like the "free-wheeling community 12-step meetings" that recovering addicts are supposed to attend. We might also hazard a guess that for Hollywood types, going to rehab in the first place is motivated by a guaranteed write-up in People rather than the desire to kick a habit, except we'd never be that cynical.