Finally, Single Women Learn the Error of Their Ways
You know what the world desperately needs? Another hastily-written, bandwagon-jumping dating manual that details all the ways in which single women must lie, fake, manipulate, and tie themselves up in knots so that some guy might consent to be their boyfriend. So yay for Rachel Greenwald—a Harvard MBA, no less—who has scraped what we hope to God is the final layer from the bottom of this tragic genre's barrel with the imaginatively-titled Why He Didn't Call You Back. Go on, aren't you dying to hear?
Greenwald applies her businessy-credentials to the age-old question by conducting "exit-interviews" with a bunch of men whose dates didn't past muster. What "deal-breakers" did she discover that she can pretend are universally applicable? We hope you're taking notes, girls!
Very important: Don't act like you have a job, or you might fall into the "stereotype of the boss-lady." Briefcases, blackberries, even a "powerful stride"—all huge mistakes. We assume that you should also keep quiet about your Harvard MBA and avoid throwing around terms like "exit-interview" and "deal-breaker."
Also, don't be a bitch, don't have any opinions, and whatever you do, don't touch your food with your fingers. As one eligible bachelor put it: "A woman who doesn't have good table manners is not a woman I can introduce to my boss." And seriously, who'd want to miss out on the chance of being selected based on how well she'll fit in at corporate functions?
To gather more of this kind of essential wisdom, you'll have to actually buy the book. But if you care one iota about the future of our civilization, please don't.
