Time for Manhunt To Admit Straights
As we learned from the lawsuit filed to open Christian dating site eHarmony to homosexuals, everyone wants to take advantage of Neil Clark Warren's methodology that pairs compatible couples. Per the terms of this week's settlement between the dating site and the state of New Jersey, eHarmony will create Compatible Partners, a separate but equal branch of the popular dating site. Congrats to the gays, but those on the straighter side don't really care who uses eHarmony: they just want the unfair barrier to insanely popular gay dating side Manhunt eradicated. New Jersey, tear down that wall!EHarmony was launched in 2000 by evangelical Christian PhD Neil Clark Warren, and purports to base itself on research of heterosexual couples. Following in the footsteps of the once staunchly hetero Jewish site JDate, the new sit Compatible Partners will use the same hokum to cater to a different clientele. The New Jersey Law Against Discrimination has had strange bedfellows before, and now some are suggesting it's only a matter of time before other niche websites will be forced to admit everyone. The fight against discrimination rolls on! Here comes the story of the Hurricane: it's long past time that popular gay cruising site ManHunt includes str8s. We felt the bear pain of computer programmer/petitioner Eric McKinley, 46, who described the frustration that straight users of Manhunt must feel every single day of their lives:
"It’s a great victory...I tried to use their Web site, and you simply cannot. You only have two options: a man seeking a woman or a woman seeking a man. I’m a man seeking a man, and obviously I can’t force it to change its interface."
Most big dating sites now allow same-sex matches, and yet the site most likely to get you laid refuses heteros. Selfish bastards! If evangelical Christians can help gay couples find happiness, I'm sure the legal community can find someone to sue so that Manhunt's gay community is forced to help straights in their quest for love. For example: what is this asshole orifice we've heard so much about? A helpful FAQ is long overdue, as is an explanation of this top/bottom dichotomy. The Manhunt site tour promises "tasty tops" and "hungry bottoms." I've practiced on Oreos, but I still don't completely understand.
And what exactly is a Man Cam — they should be forced to be more specific. Is it just a webcam for guys? Could we use it in schools? Now is exactly to the time to attack: while the gay lobby stupidly has its eye off the ball. As the legal director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights put it, "We are focused on discrimination against parents, discrimination in employment, the real core issues that have a severely negative impact on our community." Fools! And we have the perfect lawyer for the cause: former Bush solicitor general Theodore Olson sure did seem glum after the courts ruled against him and his client eHarmony. He'll obviously be happy to help bring Manhunt over to the hetero fold. And it's not like Manhunt hasn't dipped its toes into straighter waters before. Site chairman Jonathan Crutchley had to resign late last summer when it was revealed he'd made a sizeable donation to the McCain campaign. This discrimination will not stand. Heteros can sit in silence no longer — Manhunt belongs to us, too.