Uh-oh: it's the brand-new blog of Lindsay Lohan father/religious fanatic/jailed DUI-er Michael Lohan. Don't hope for gossip, however: "let me say that this website is NOT about Lindsay or Samantha."

However, the topic proves too hard to resist:

Today, on TMZ, my darling daughter Lindsay was asked for a comment in response to me saying, "Samantha is on drugs!" Lindsay’s only response was, “look at him!”

WOW! Linds, how forthright! Let me ask you; was it me who was actually pictured in the train station with a bag full of prescription drugs? Do you see me out partying with Lindsay, my other children or having raging wars with her?

OK, Dad! The rest is a litany of fameballing, self-promotion, and Biblical mumbo-jumbo, best exemplified by this paragraph:

AGAIN, this website is a forum to shed light on things in a positive and truthful way. It is about bringing the world the truth about any situations or stories reported in the media that are worthy of discussing. It is about righting the wrongs and determining facts from fiction.

...Whether you realize it or not, this website is about getting people involved in a positive way, while leading them to the Truth, which in essence, is God. For those of you who choose to denounce or blasphemy the Word or Spirit of God, be very careful, because he sees, knows and judges your heart. (1 Samuel 16:7).

And in his first post, he laid down some ground rules: "First of all, try your best to refrain from cursing, lying or baring false witness. I know this is hard for some of you, but try."

He's right. It is hard for some of us.

[Michael Lohan Online via Just Jared]