While Momma's Boys continues to advance the reality dating show genre in lightly incestuous ways, the stale Bachelor franchise looks to be growing desperate.

How else to explain some of the measures taken on last night's premiere, in which personable single-dad Jason Mesnick (himself the rejectee of stunningly blank-brained Bachelorette Deanna Pappas, herself the rejectee of Hunkiest Bachelor Ever Brad Womack) sat slack-jawed and powerless over host Chris Harrison's demand that the 25 candidates vote one out. Of course, they played right into producers' hands: Once identified, the toilet-mouthed mother-of-one was instead given the evening's first rose, her highly developed, catfight-instigating talents sure to be put to good use in episodes to come.

But were that the only cheap gimmick in store! In the preview above, Pappas makes a return to tell the runner-up she'd made a terrible mistake in thwarting him in favor of Jesse Csincsak, the snowboarding simpleton she recently left at the altar.

Seriously—who writes this shit?