Infallible God that she is, Oprah never makes a mistake. No, what happens is that people make mistakes near her and then her gravitational pull forces them close to her. Like Herman Rosenblat's lying!

Oprah herself still hasn't said anything about why she's so easy to lie to, including this fake Holocaust tale. Rosenblat first lied in a newspaper contest about meeting his beloved wife Roma when he was in a concentration camp and she threw apples over the fence to nourish him and they, after years separated by the post-war diaspora, supposedly met again and fell in love in Brooklyn. It's a sweet story! And it would have probably stopped there, but it was so sweet that Oprah, Master of the Three Realms, bellowed an edict and brought the couple on the show way back in 1996.

Flash forward 12 years and Rosenblat writes a memoir called Angel at the Fence which, before being published, is quickly debunked as cockamamie schmaltzery, he admits it, and then Oprah—who had called this the greatest love story ever told (apparently she hasn't seen What Happens In Vegas)—stays mum. Because, see above, Oprah didn't make a mistake. Rosenblat did. So eventually she has a web site lackey slip out a little admission that maybe this story that she and her website have been touting for so long is maybe a little not so real. How dare Rosenblat make Oprah apologize for him?

The best part? The meek website admission says that everything is lies, "including how he met his wife." Ha! Srsly? Isn't that part the whole story? Ah well. Best not to dwell on it. Now if you'll excuse me I have to get these calves to the dais for sacrifice.