Well that didn't take long. America must drop everything and deal with this pirate menace! Where are the Marines? Piracy is the new terrorism! Call out the big jets! We need serious "cannon fire":

Clip one: Glenn Beck brings the situation home for you. Pirates are terrorists. Which he proves by doing his "Pirate guy" imitation.


Clip two: This old general tells you exactly how to blow the fuck out of pirates. He's thought about this a lot.