The New York Times Will Make You Feel Poor And Mad
The Way We Live Now: Chewing the cud of resentment. The New York Times has assigned all of its reporters to ferret out and write up the most awkward and awful examples of opulence, as if they were news. Hey I wonder if Per Se's kitchen is nice, still?
In fact the kitchen of one of America's most expensive restaurants is still nice! Much nicer than yours. How much nicer? The New York Times has traveled to the kitchen of Per Se, to tell you. "Even as the rest of the planet scrapes together money for the rent check, there seems no end to the bountiful provisions that stream in through its doors."
Is there a game afoot at the New York Times, may we ask? Is there some sort of office pool that everyone has contributed to, and now they rush out to win the contest of "Find the Most Grating Possible Thing to a Poor Person Caught in the Throes of Economic Crisis, and Write The Fuck About that Thing." You probably already knew that Per Se had a nice kitchen. Thank you for confirming the suspicion, New York Times!
But that person is not walking off with the office pool so easily. Oh no. You thought that was a superfluous story about the upper crust? How about a sympathetic story on their kids being forced to work to help pay for part of their super-expensive summer camps? This is how the wealthy experience the recession, you see, and the paper of record is right there, with ten or twelve reporters, on the scene, recording it.
"When you have a 16-year-old and he's excited about doing something, you encourage it," said Jill D., a lawyer in New York who asked that her surname not be published. She and her husband have canceled a family trip and their own summer vacation to free up $5,000 for their son's Caribbean scuba program.
Well Jill D., next year your 17 year-old will be excited about buying a $5,000 pound of chronic and studying entrepreneurship, so cancel next year's summer vacation now. You'll share a cab to Coney Island and like it.
[Pic via]