PR Girl Gone Wild Seeks Redemption with Hallmark Sentiments
When she's not being arrested for eavesdropping and computer trespass former Dolce & Gabanna flack Ali Wise has been spending her time in the Duane Reade greeting card aisle. Now she's seeking forgiveness by tweeting the pablum she read there.
Cityfile has hacked into her been following her Twitter account and there have been two recent cryptically transparent dispatches. The first reads, "Someone very wise told me to 'Ask. Believe. Let go and say Thank You." We have a feeling that the "someone wise" had a barcode and a $1.99 sticker on the back of it, because there is no way D&G had cheesy corporate inspiration posters hanging around the office next to the photos of half-naked men.
And if you ask us, we believe she should let go and say, "Thank you" for giving her an orange jumpsuit. It will look great with her coloring!
The next is right out of "Bartlett's Quotations," actually, her best fashion gay probably told it to her, because she seems more likely to read your emails secretly than an actual book. She types, "'Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.' Oscar Wilde."
Actually, we know something that might annoy them more. How about using a Spoofcard to gain access to someone's voicemail (in this case interior designer Nina Freudenberger) and then coming up with lame excuses why it's not illegal.
Sorry to say it, Ali, but we have a feeling that—no matter how many 140 character pleas you unleash on the internet—we know which card you're going to read next: "Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200."