Kristen Stewart's corruption of Dakota Fanning is complete, Joe Francis is filing for bankruptcy, and Kirstie Alley says Conan "acts like I bit his dick off." Thursday's gossip has castration anxiety.

  • Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning make out in The Runaways, and Dakota said they "were so into the scene." Dakota, who also co-starred with sulky Stewart in New Moon, continued: "It was passionate. We're playing Joan Jett and Cherie Curie and they're best friends in the film and became really close in real life. And that's something that went down back in the '70s." Actually, that's something that goes down now, too, but the bigger issue here is: Little Dakota Fanning grew up so fast! It seems like only yesterday Kathy Griffin was making inappropriate jokes about Dakota going to rehab, and now she's actually old enough to do such a thing, and to make out in movies, and do lesbian sex scenes, &c. [ShowBizSpy]
  • Joe Francis plans to file for bankruptcy today, because he owes the IRS $33,819,087.14, and while they wait for him to cough it up, they've frozen some $100M of his assets. Three issues of disbelief: (1) Why does this man have so much money? Yes, this comes up every time there is a story about Joe Francis' ungodly wealth, but it is necessary to keep saying it, lest we lose our grip on how wretched a world that rewards this man truly is. (2) He racked this debt up in three shorts years. Let this be is a lesson in the terror of IRS interest rates. (3) Does the IRS really need to specify down to the fourteenth penny in this case? You'd think that once you hit the $10M mark, they'd round to the nearest thousand or something. [TMZ]
  • Kirstie Alley says Conan "acts like I bit his dick off." During a twitter bitch-fest with Star Jones about how much they hate people who laugh at fat celebs, Kirstie nicknamed him "CONAN O'BITCH O'BRIEN" prompting Star to joke about "brothers from Brooklyn" who "wanted some" (I think. Between the typos and ellipses I'm having trouble making sense of this stuff. It's like decoding hieroglyphics.) and LOLs all around. [HuffPo]
  • Rihanna's dating again! She spent time with 90210 star Tristan Wilds in L.A. last weekend, and appreciates how he is "a real gentleman." Did we mention he's working on a CD? [NYDN]
  • Nicole Richie has been hospitalized for pneumonia. Richie skipped the launch of her Bebe jewelry line House of Harlow last week because she felt sick—did she already have pneumonia then? Are little Harlow and Sparrow okay? [ShowBizSpy]
  • This advice will help an entire generation of starlets: Pam Anderson explains how came clean to her kids about her sex tape with their dad. Anderson says she anticipated a new wave of interest following her cameo on Borat, so explained to her 12- and 11-year-old sons that videotaping sex is something that happens when you are "massively in love," which, for some reason, strikes me as kind of sweet. I always thought a cleaned-up Tommy Lee was the one meant for Pammy. [NYDN]
  • Suri Cruise threw a tantrum over a mink coat she saw in a store window. Katie Holmes said no, so Suri cried, and I am reminded yet again that this child's life is 800 times better than mine. [ShowBizSpy]
  • Robert Pattinson needs to learn which stories about rabid fans are funny and which just freak us out. In a taped interview with Ellen DeGeneres airing Friday, Pattinson describes how he once cajoled a female fan into getting naked in public. An autograph-seeker asked, "What can I do to get your attention?" and Pattinson replied, "um, just take your clothes off." The girl ripped her clothes off and "got dragged out of the room by security." Lest we think Edward Cullen a total perv he adds that he "never felt more terrible," it's just that he has a terrible sense of humor, you see. [People]
  • The patriarch of a family that received tens of millions from Michael Jackson to settle a molestation case committed suicide yesterday. Evan Chandler shot himself in the head in his home and was "extremely ill" with cancer, so it probably had nothing to do with Jacko, but the MJ conspiracy theorists will probably go nuts today, anyway. [CNN]
  • Erin Andrews' alleged peephole stalker has been charged with one count of internet stalking. Court documents reveal that he used the email address handsfouryou@yahoo.com, which reminds me of Mr. Hands, the guy who died of a perforated colon after having sex with a horse. This raises an interesting question: Who is creepier, Mr. Hands or Mr. HandsFourYou? At least the horse consented, sort of. Anyway, Mr. HandsFourYou gave his peephole video the file name "Erin Andrews Naked Butt," suggesting that his ability to foresee the consequences of his actions were as weak as Mr. Hands'. [TMZ]