It would scarcely be an exaggeration to say that nothing is more pleasing to us than a clumsily-handled college newspaper date rape column controversy. It has everything: Idiot college misogyny! Strident college anti-misogyny! Overly-serious college journalists! And (theoretical) sexxx!

STEP ONE: On March 28, the American University student newspaper runs a column by (gay Republican!) Alex Knepper (pictured), entitled "Dealing with AU's anti-sex brigade." Does young Alex deal with this brigade by seducing them and sexxxing them up, exposing the error of their ways? Alas, no. He just writes crap like, I don't know, this:

Let's get this straight: any woman who heads to an EI party as an anonymous onlooker, drinks five cups of the jungle juice, and walks back to a boy's room with him is indicating that she wants sex, OK? To cry "date rape" after you sober up the next morning and regret the incident is the equivalent of pulling a gun to someone's head and then later claiming that you didn't ever actually intend to pull the trigger.

STEP TWO: OMG everybody was so mad.

STEP THREE: The school administration is Very Concerned About This Important Issue.

STEP FOUR: OMG it's all up in the media!

STEP FIVE: The paper backtracks.

STEP SIX: Gawker. I tell ya, it's the same story every time, but it never gets old. Brash, proud and unbowed rebuke from the original columnist—or meek retraction—TK.

[Pic via]