Silver Spoons star Ricky Schroder went to Washington, D.C. last week. "I met with the Prime Minister of Zimbabwe and with the guys at the Pentagon to see if I could help them with anything entertainment related." God help us.

Apparently former child actors are required to act like energetic children for the rest of their lives, which is why the former NYPD Blue actor sipped colas, clapped hands, and spoke enthusiastically when he received a Spirit Award for supporting the troops. Politico's gossipy little sister, Click, offers a bewildered report:

"I went to the Ball on the Mall last week. And I met with the Prime Minister of Zimbabwe and with the guys at the Pentagon to see if I could help them with anything entertainment related," he said by phone on Thursday.

"I've been a long-term supporter of the armed services, for years and years and years," he said. "Without them I can't do what I do and you can't do what you do."

Schroder says he tried to enlist in the Army after 9/11 but, alas, he has asthma and was seen as "medically unfit."

"I've been coming to D.C. since Reagan's Inaugural, when I was a boy, and was here for George Bush Sr.'s and Jr.'s inauguration and Obama's inauguration," he said. "I love watching the way our government works."

Watch, but don't touch, little Ricky. You might break it. [Click, pic via Getty]