TMZ is reporting that Army private and WikiLeaks source Chelsea Manning was hospitalized yesterday after prison officials at the U.S. Disciplinary Barracks in Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, discovered Manning attempting to kill herself. An unnamed prison official told TMZ that Manning is being “monitored.” An unnamed source also told the site that Manning “tried to hang herself.”

The Pentagon will no longer ban transgender people from serving openly in the U.S. military, Defense Secretary Ash Carter announced this afternoon.

A profile of Hillary Clinton in the latest issue of the New York Times Magazine makes the case, convincingly, that the Democratic frontrunner is the most hawkish candidate in the race, from her upbringing as the daughter of a Navy training officer to her disagreements, as secretary of state, with President Obama over use of force. The piece outlines her relationships with several powerful current and former members of the military, and notes that the “single greatest influence” on her thinking about the military is a retired George W. Bush-era four-star general named Jack Keane.

You hear that? It’s the sound of 582 billion dollar bills falling down an infinitely deep hole, as narrated by your Secretary of Defense, Ash Carter. Yes, his name’s Ash. And yes, he’s going to spend a couple billion defending outer space from ISIS.

In Washington today, the leaders of the U.S. Army and Marine Corps told Congress that it’s time for all American women to register for the draft. Must we begin to fret?

A 48-year-old U.S. Navy commander named Michael Misiewicz has plead guilty to an array of corruption charges stemming from several expensive kickbacks he received from Glenn Defense Marine Asia, a Singaporean defense contractor. According to The Washington Post, Glenn Defense repeatedly rewarded Misiewicz for rerouting certain naval aircraft carriers to overseas ports under their control (allowing them to bill the Department of Defense for millions of dollars) and for divulging information about the carriers’ whereabouts, which are considered classified military secrets:

Remember Matthew Bissonnette (a.k.a. “Mark Owen”), the former Navy SEAL who helped find and kill Osama bin Laden, later wrote a book about it, and eventually came under federal investigation for allegedly mishandling classified material? Bissonnette’s increasingly complex legal ordeal initially involved the Department of Justice and U.S. Navy before it was handed over to the latter’s internal police force, the Naval Criminal Investigative Service, in the summer of 2014. The N.C.I.S. probe quickly threw the small community of elite military members into chaos. SOFREP, a website catering to that community, reported at the time: “The investigation has created a massive stir among the SEAL community. Rumors and accusations are flying on social media forums, lines in the sand have been drawn and friendships have ended.”

On April 29, 2013, National Airlines Flight 102 lifted off from Bagram Airfield, in northeast Afghanistan, carrying several tons of U.S. military equipment destined for the Emirati city of Dubai. Within minutes of liftoff, at 3:27 p.m. local time, the Boeing 747 aircraft suddenly stalled before crashing into one of Bagram’s open fields. The fuselage exploded upon impact, killing all seven crew members. You may remember watching a dramatic video of the crash captured by a nearby vehicle’s dashboard camera that was uploaded to the video website LiveLeak a day later.

Following an incident last week in which several cadets dressed up like the Ku Klux Klan, The Citadel military college is investigating claims that some cadets have been “harassed.” In a statement to The Post and Courier, The Citadel declined to provide any information about who was harassed and why, but it’s not hard to fill in the blanks there.

Bowe Bergdahl, the Army sergeant who deserted his post in the Patika province of Afghanistan in 2009 and was rescued after five years in Taliban captivity, will face a court-martial for the charges brought against him, military sources said on Monday.

In a statement today, the president of The Citadel military college in Charleston, South Carolina explained that the above photos of Citadel cadets show the young men “singing Christmas carols as part of a ‘Ghosts of Christmas Past’ skit.” I don’t know—looks like a KKK thing to me.

Tomorrow is Veterans Day. Spare a thought for the hundreds of veterans currently sitting on death row somewhere in America.

In the weeks before a team of Navy SEALS killed Osama bin Laden in his Abottabad compound, a team of Obama administration lawyers secretly crafted a pre-emptive legal justification for his killing, a New York Times report alleges.

The Intercept has obtained a new cache of top secret documents detailing how the U.S. government hunts and kills suspected terrorists from the sky. It reveals a sprawling, labyrinthine machine for remote executions—and one that leaves unintended bodies by the craters.

The US Defense Department has barred the University of Phoenix from recruiting on military bases or taking federal money from soldiers following allegations of recruiting misconduct, and also due to the general fact that the University of Phoenix is trash.

Forty soldiers in Army Ranger training were hospitalized on Wednesday after they were struck by lightning. “The students were learning lightning protection protocols at the time of the incident.”

A US Military F-16 fighter jet seemed to “fall out of the sky” Wednesday night near the Mexican border, exploding and sparking a large fire.

We know Richard Matt is a convicted killer on the loose. We know, thanks to my colleague Jordan Sargent, that “Matt is very handsome and, in all frankness, very well endowed.” Now we also know that Matt, for some weird reason, has this massive Marine Corps tattoo, even though the Marines say he never served.

Rick Perry’s presidential campaign launched today on the premise that you don’t need to be able to count to three as long as you can push the red button. But amid his militaristic orgy of self-praise, dumb media people had a dumb media argument about the emo twins flanking Perry. Caitlyn Jenner was involved.