Teresa Giudice, the Real Housewife of New Jersey who is $11 million in debt, is selling the enormous novelty house that's been featured like a funny sidekick on her show these past two seasons. For $3.99m, it can be yours.

The rococo chateau features:

  • Six bedrooms, five and a half baths
  • Custom marble floors throughout
  • Breakfast bar
  • Three fireplaces
  • Wine room
  • Certified Classy™ brand garden decorations (including fountain and Sicilian peasants)
  • Tanning studio
  • Gun closet
  • Italian sex swing
  • Large, whirring forehead enlargener machine in the basement (may not be functional)
  • Montville school district

You should buy this house! Sure you'll be haunted nightly by the ghosts of stoolies, but think of all that marble, granite, and onyx. Sweet, sweet onyx.

[via Real Estalker]