Parker Spitzer Is Exactly as Useless as You Thought It Would Be
Tonight was the premiere of Parker Spitzer, the horribly-named new CNN current events show with former New York governor Eliot Spitzer and Washington Post columnist Kathleen Parker. How was it? Be glad you watched Dancing With the Stars instead.
This clip is part of a sequence called "Unfinished Business," an apparently regular segment where Spitzer will bring on guests to talk about cases he prosecuted while he was attorney general of New York. Tonight's guest: Henry Blodget, the former Merrill Lynch employee whose career as an analyst was torpedoed by Spitzer (Blodger is also the CEO of Business Insider). After an endless introduction, Henry bounds out and proceeds to, well, have a weird sort of heart-to-heart with Spitzer? I don't know, it sounds like a version of a coffee date with an ex-girlfriend where everyone is feeling magnanimous and ready for closure. (Can't wait for the "Unfinished Business" segment with Ashley Dupré.)
For better or worse, Blodget's appearance was the highlight. The rest of the guests—columnist Thomas Frank, conservative publisher Andrew Breitbart, consumer advocate Elizabeth Warren, and Social Network writer Aaron Sorkin—were hustled on and off the set in about five minutes, each. (The pacing of the whole show is really weird—at no point is a guest or a segment given enough time to become comfortable.) Eliot Spitzer really, really loves to talk, more than he loves to "interview guests." And he's really, really excited to do so. It's kind of sweet! Except that even when his self-proclaimed "hero," consumer advocate Elizabeth Warren was on, he couldn't help but dominate the conversation. (The upside of this is that Kathleen Parker doesn't talk very much, which is just fine, really).
The weirdest part of the whole show was the "Political Party" a sad little Morning Joe ripoff where the hosts cram four more people around their tiny little table (seriously, they are sitting around, like, a bedside table), introduce them with inane little biographical anecdotes (just like Jeopardy!) and then have them all answer the same question. Today's first topic: Say One Nice Thing About Sarah Palin. The second topic: What Is Your Guilty Pleasure? (And before you say anything, Eliot Spitzer's guilty pleasure is NASCAR, not "having unprotected sex with hookers while wearing black socks). The third topic: Why Are There No People of Color on This Show? (Just kidding! That question was never answered.)
Oh, well. It's not like we were expecting anything! At least no one accused the Jews of controlling the media.