Injured Spider-Man Actor Says the Show Must Go On

Clearly a dark agent of Julie Taymor and company, Chris Tierney — the performer who plummeted thirty feet during a performance of Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, sparking an outcry against the show — says it's allll good. Game on!

Tierney cracked ribs and vertebrae in the accident, spent some time in the hospital, and is now undergoing physical therapy. And doing TV interviews! He says he's eager to get back to the show, because these are the risks of creating exciting, dynamic theater, etc. A likely story. The only logical thing to assume here is that director Taymor and her shadowy cabal of producers have activated the microchip they implanted in Tierney's head (and in those of the other cast members who appeared with Tierney on Good Morning America today) that turns him into a robotic shill machine for The Show, that turgid, out-of-control golem of hubris and mania that's stalking 42nd street. That's the only possible explanation! Too bad they didn't get to Natalie Mendoza in time.

Watch Tierney's two interviews below.