Here's how all those "spotted" items get in gossip columns: celebrities eat at restaurants, restaurants tell their PR people, PR people call gossip columnists, and—voila!—"Celebrity A was spotted at Restaurant B last night." But what if the restaurant is a shitty chain eatery, and the "celebrity" is a 13-year-old girl whose father decided to get into politics and who has never taken an affirmative step toward establishing her own notoriety? Same thing.

Below is an e-mail we got yesterday from a publicist who thought we'd like to write about a 13-year-old's birthday party that Malia Obama attended last weekend (we've redacted any info that would identify the restaurant because we don't want to give it the publicity it was seeking):

Just wanted to let you know that on March 5 there was a surprise visit from the secret service to [RESTAURANT NAME REDACTED] in Washington D.C. followed by the arrival of Malia Obama (the older daughter of President Obama) 45 minutes later. She was a guest at the [REDACTED] table for her friend's 13th birthday party. The menu consisted of Fried Mozzarella, Mixed Green Salad, Margherita Pizza and Penne San Remo followed by an enthusiastic [REDACTED] birthday song that could be heard down the street from all members of the staff.

Thought that this is something that you may be able to mention on Gawker.com.

Please let me know if you have any questions.

Thank you!
Leah DeSimone
Account Executive
BRAINtrust Marketing + Communications

We ignored it, because it's fairly gross to be flacking your restaurant by tracking the comings and goings of 13-year-olds. Leah followed up today: "Just wanted to follow up with you to see if there is any way that you could mention this on your site."

So yes, Leah. Here you go.

[Photo of Barack and Malia Obama via Getty]