I finally pried last week's copy of the National Enquirer from Maureen O'Connor's cold dead hands and found this funny article that says Bravo honcho and America's gayest homosexual Andy Cohen wants to get gay married to Anderson Cooper, America's least eligible gay bachelor. Oh, sweet love!

Everyone who watches Watch What Happens Live, Andy Cohen's shockingly entertaining talk show on Bravo, knows that he and the Coop are close friends. Anderson has even been a guest both by phone and in person. According to the National Enquirer, Cohen has a "man crush on [Cooper]—and pals say he's gunning to snatch the news hunk away from his boyfriend." Oh snap! Now, this is the Enquirer so this should all be taken with more grains of salt than the Real Housewives have wigs, but they did break the John Edwards scandal wide open, so who knows?

The tabloid points out that Cooper has been dating his current boyfriend, gay bar owner Benjamin Maisani, for several years, but when the boyfriend isn't around, Andy is always trying to get with Anderson. The Enquirer's potentially fabricated source says, "Something is definitely going on. Anderson's boyfriend Ben had better watch his back because Andy is ready to knock him out of the picture!" Snap!

Now saying that a gay man wants Anderson Cooper to be his boyfriend is kind of like saying a contestant on America's Next Top Model isn't there to make friends—it's just so incredibly obvious. Who doesn't want to marry foxy, wealthy, otherwise wonderful (except for the whole in-the-closet thing) Anderson Cooper? While this is probably just baseless speculation, I'd like to pretend that it's real. It would really make for an excellent love story, and it would give me some amazingly hot slash fiction to write in my head. In fact, The Observer should start revising their media power couple list right now.

[Image via Getty]