Virginia Del. Dave Albo brought down the state house floor with this prepared monologue today.

Governor Bob McDonnell said this week that he would not support a bill that required the medically unnecessary procedure—a great relief to women who value the ability to choose whether or not they're going to have plastic probes shoved up their vaginas. But Albo didn't want to pass up the opportunity to publicly make fun of his wife and of people who opposed the bill. Thus:

I got Rita some red wine, sat next to her, used my patented cool move. I invented this, it's a United States patent. I went, "Ohhh, I'm so tired!" I then turn on the TV to find the Redskin channel. I know you think that's weird, but my wife loves the Redskins more than she loves me. Got my theme music going, my red wine, looking at the Washington Redskins and I start flipping through the channels. And through the channels you have to get through the news stuff. And all the sudden on my big screen TV comes this big thing and a picture of a bill that has "Albo" on it. I went, "Wow! Holy smokes, it's my name as big as a wall!" And the very next scene was a gentleman from Alexandria's face as big as my wall going "trans-v-this" and "trans-v-that" and "they hate women!" and "we're gonna—in that bill—she's crazy!" And I'm like this with my wife. And the show's over, and she looks at me, and she goes, "I gotta go to bed." So if the gentleman's plan was to make sure there was one less Republican in this world, he did it.

Bow chicka... No.

[Political Wire]