Who Was the Biggest Breakout Star of Hurricane Sandy?

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Whenever something serious happens, the internet does its best to become distracted by minor characters and occurrences only tangentially related to the actual news story.

We love the little girl who becomes distracted by her own image during her father's political speech, the funny hat that attended Kate and William's royal wedding, and, most recently, the reverse centaur who must surely be tired after running through our minds and local newscasts all day.

As nominated by the Gawker staff, here are the biggest breakout stars of Hurricane Sandy:

• Jet Ski Douche
• The Tale of the Horse Head Jogger
• WNBC's Pat Battle
• Jersey Boy Chris Christie
• Jeremy from the Second Presidential Debate
• The Reporter Who Got His Foot Stuck in Sand
• The Gentleman Reclining in Nature's Living Room
• The Photoshop of Liberty

and, of course, the biggest breakout star of all: Mayor Bloomberg's Sign Language Interpreter, Lydia Callis.

Think you can assemble a more star-studded list? Talk is cheap, son. Let's see it.