All the Words Carly Fiorina Will Never Say
Carly Fiorina suspended her campaign for president this afternoon, having failed to claim any delegates in the New Hampshire primary. This is good for the country, but also kind of sad, because there is so much that Carly Fiorina has left unsaid.
Throughout her campaign, Fiorina developed a habit of alluding to certain “inappropriate” words without actually saying them. Now that her days on the trail are over, she will never again get the opportunity to utter those words on the national stage. Carly, you missed your chance.
As we say goodbye to the terrible former CEO and her final shred of relevance, let us remember the words she would not say.
The V-word
In an interview with Boston Herald Radio in December, Fiorina referred, confusingly, to the “V-word.” What’s the V-word? See if you can guess, based on how she refused to say it:
I’ve now been called the V-word as well by the Cruz campaign. Yes V, and I won’t say that word either. But suffice it to say—V as in Victor—when I told my story, my American dream story of my life, a prominent member of the Cruz campaign said that I had gone full V-word.
She meant “vagina.”
The B-word
In the same interview, Fiorina also referred to another gendered insult she’d received over the course of her career. “I have been called several B-words,” she said.
Damn. Could have said “bitch” on the radio.
The ??? word
Perhaps Fiorina’s greatest missed opportunity to say a bad word in public came in January, when she told a South Carolina crowd that Donald Trump was just like Kim Kardashian.
“You know, Donald Trump is the Kim Kardashian of politics,” she said. “He has a big mouth. She has a big ‘you-know-what.’”
Did the people of South Carolina know what????
Unfortunately, no one will ever again ask Fiorina what she meant, because she is no longer running for president. For the crime of running a dismally boring campaign, she has been sentenced to a lifetime of saying “butt” only to herself.