Sister Wives' Kody Brown Is Officially in a Monogamous Marriage

God is good! Central Arizona’s most iconic spiritual marriage-martyrs Kody Brown and Meri Brown confirmed their split after 32 years together in the forthcoming Sister Wives: One-on-One special, according to People. Wife Christine Brown announced her split with Kody last November, and earlier this week, wife Janelle Brown canned his stupid ass too. With Meri’s confirmation, that makes three wives gone. The strained relations have been playing out on the phenomenal season 17 of Sister Wives.

Do you know what this means? It means Kody is finally a practicing monogamist, which seems to have been his ultimate goal ever since he welcomed his only remaining wife Robyn Brown into the fold in 2010. Kody legally divorced Meri in 2014 in order to adopt Robyn’s kids from a previous marriage. Ever since, Meri’s gotten catfished (she’s ok now) and basically moved to southern Utah to run a bed-and-breakfast called Lizzie’s Heritage Inn with her close friend Jenn. She hasn’t been around much in the last few seasons of Sister Wives, and Kody has been begging her to leave him for years, but this is the first inkling that Meri understands that.

God is so, so, so good, and clearly realizes what the rest of have come to know: Kody sucks so much shit.

Kody’s strong suit is not communicating, and he is often overwhelmed by his tempestuous emotions (perhaps a mental symptom of long Covid, which slayed him harder than anyone in the world, even the people who died). For example, in last week’s finale episode, at one point he yelled in a talking head confessional, “Plural marriage is not all beer and Skittles!” and absolutely nobody had any idea what he was talking about. Looks like Kody forgot to tell Meri that she was now free to get catfished in Southern Utah, if she chose to do so. He’d be driving around in his visor and fingerless work gloves without her, happy as a damn clam.

Per People:

During her conversation with [Sister Wives: One-on-One] host Sukanya Krishnan, Meri watches a clip of Kody saying he doesn't consider himself married to her. "If she wanted to move on and marry another, she wouldn't get into an argument with me," he tells cameras in a confessional.

Sukanya then asks Meri how it makes her feel to hear those words from her husband.

"It just doesn't make sense to me that he would be so frustrated with Christine [Brown] and be like, 'She just made this decision. We didn't consult, we didn't talk, she just made the decision and then he says, 'No, I don't consider myself married to Meri,'" she says. "Like, he just made the decision. I've never heard him say that to me."

Meri, unfortunately, is still open to “making things work.” She tells Sukanya that she’s open to reconciliation, “But I don't think that he's interested." He’s not.

Good luck handling this guy alone, loyal Robyn. If you wanna announce in the next few days you’re over it too, you could get like five husbands, just like that. God is good!