After three years of incubation, a human has emerged from Hayden Panettiere's country-western womb. The human, a woman, has been dubbed "Kaya."

Nothing displeases the Baby Name Critic more than a name like "Kaya" and its counterpart, "Kaia" (which means, loosely, "by the sea" in Hawaiian). This is a name not meant to age with a child and accompany it through life, but to evoke a feeling, like "Cordovan leather" or "Angelina Jolie." The name Kaya says: My head is full of ocean air, and my hair is full of kelp.

A strong name should have a singular distinct meaning and a clear cultural lineage. This is not so with Kaya. According to Baby Name Wizard, Kaya means, across several languages, "wealthy elder little sister rock yew of the physical body temperament tomorrow [garbled translation] skin."

Kaya's middle name is Evdokia, which is Greek and means "happiness." Cool name.

This has been Baby Name Critic.

Leah Finnegan is Gawker's Baby Name Critic.

[Pic via Getty]