Firefighters Help Man Remove Penis From a Toaster
A London man called the London Fire Brigade to report that his penis was stuck in a toaster. While the firefighters were not given a sufficient explanation as to how his dick ended up in the appliance, they were able to safely extricate the organ.
But the Toaster Penis Incident is not the only occurrence of its kind to plague the LFB. Since 2010, more than 1300 calls have come in reporting something “trapped or stuck.”
Common occurrences:
• Four incidents where people had their hands stuck in blenders
• Five incidents involving people’s hands being stuck in shredders
• Nine instances of men with rings stuck on their penises
• 17 incidents involving children with their fingers stuck in toys, including one with Lego stuck on his finger.
• 18 incidents involving children with their heads stuck in potties or toilet seats
• 79 incidents involving people being trapped in handcuffs
Isolated incidents:
• A man with his arm stuck in a Portaloo
• A child with its hand trapped in a sweet machine
• A child with its head trapped in an ironing board
• An adult stuck in a child’s toy car
• A child with its head stuck in a massage chair
• A child with its foot stuck in a brass vase
• Someone with a test tube stuck on their finger
• A child with a tambourine stuck on its head
• A man with a sewing machine needle stuck in his finger.
Third Officer Dave Brown believes Fifty Shades of Grey might be playing a role in some of the incidents: ““I don’t know whether it’s the Fifty Shades effect, but the number of incidents involving items like handcuffs seems to have gone up.”
While I’m not sure if Fifty Shades of Grey explains away the toaster thing it is, apparently, a thing. Here’s a Facebook page dedicated to “Sticking your penis in a toaster.” And some fun Yahoo Answers discussing the activity as well.