Touchdown! Aaron Rodgers Caught COVID Despite “Homeopathic” Care

There are only three football players I can name off the top of my head. Tom Brady, of course. Colin Kaepernick, obviously. And, if really pressed, I would throw Aaron Rodgers in there, too. Not because of anything he has done sports-wise as a Green Bay Packers quarterback, but because I know he is engaged to the admirably environmentally-minded actress Shailene Woodley, who did not star in The Hunger Games (she was in the other one), but did once share that she likes to make her own medicines and occasionally eat clay.

Given what I do know about the star (see above), as well as what I know about Rodgers (which is, again, just that he is Woodley’s fiancé, and also once dated John Mulaney’s pregnant paramour Olivia Munn, according to my editor), it is not such a huge surprise to learn this new fact about Rodgers: he has tested positive for COVID-19.

This is despite his claiming to be “immunized” when asked if he was vaccinated in August. ESPN reports that, before training camp, Rodgers sought to be classified as vaccinated by the NFL after receiving alternative medicine, which, according to the NFL Network, consisted of “homeopathic treatment from his personal doctor to raise his antibody levels.” The league said no, and Rodgers was required to follow daily testing and mask wearing protocols around other players and coaches. Obviously, neither those protocols nor Rodgers’s natural remedies were enough to keep him from contracting COVID.

The player will now have to sit out the upcoming game against the Kansas City Chiefs, as he is mandated to spend 10 days away from his team. The earliest he can rejoin is November 13, the day before their scheduled game against the Seattle Seahawks.

During Rodgers’s time off, perhaps he can spend some time Facetiming with his fiancée. There’s plenty of topics to catch up on, such as how much Woodley “loves love,” no longer really minds being called “the Hippie of Hollywood,” and enjoyed the beach a month ago.