Earlier this morning, a restaurant full of wildly unlucky, likely cursed New Hampshire voters had to pretend to eat breakfast while Chris Christie discussed the act of putting his penis inside of a woman’s vagina. Which he has done. Multiple times.

The brief interlude into the sex life of the New Jersey governor and blanched pork chop came as Christie was discussing the times he’s chosen not to follow his Catholic faith to a T:

I’m a Catholic, but I’ve used birth control, and not just the rhythm method, OK?

My church has a teaching against birth control. Does that make me an awful Catholic? Because I believe, and practiced, that function during part of my life? I don’t think so. But you know what? I’m only going to find out when it’s my time to be judged.

In other words, the sex times.

Chris Christie, not a virgin, wishes you all a lovely morning.

[h/t The Hill]


Contact the author at ashley@gawker.com.