Royal Baby Officially on Christ's Radar
A baby who we all know, Prince George of Cambridge, is having yet another of the hundred billion strange experiences that, taken together, constitute a human life today: his parents are dressing him in a big lace dress, singing songs at him, and putting water on his head in exchange for one (1) General Admission ticket to the afterlife, first come first served, no assigned seating. He's being christened.
Seven of Prince William and Kate Middleton's friends were named as godparents. Despite months of speculation that Prince Harry and Pippa Middleton would be among those chosen, their inherent godless natures apparently made them unsuitable candidates. For a full list of those who were chosen (why is it important for you to know? I promise you are not on the list), click here.
Fancy photos of the family are set to be released on Thursday. At the moment, everyone is eating the recently defrosted top tier of Kate and William's wedding cake ("christening cake") and pretending it doesn't taste two years old.
[Images via AP]