Scared Man Fondles Cloth
The presumptive face of the Republican Party screamed a series of loosely related words at thousands of people in Tampa earlier today, pausing only to clap quietly to himself as he embraced a large piece of colored cloth.
The flag fondling came in response to Donald Trump’s devotees chanting back at the candidate to “build that wall.” Apparently confused by the loud noises coming from someone other than himself, Trump takes several steps back, glances at his surroundings, and ultimately decides to clutch one of the American flags arranged behind him.
[There was a video here]
We hope that, in the embrace, Trump was able to find the solace he seeks.
You can watch the hour-long ordeal in full below.
