ABC Television Group president sent out a memo this morning telling everyone to face the "harsh reality of having to eliminate jobs." ABC News is laying off 35-40 staffers, in a move rumored for months. One source tells us cuts will come mostly in New York (with some in LA), largely in the marketing/ research/ sales departments.
TVNewser reports that 60 open positions also won't be filled, and they have the extremely vague memo announcing the cuts. If you know more details, email us.

ABC might move Jimmy Kimmel Live to compete with Conan O'Brien's Tonight Show, the New York Times is reporting. ABC is pissed about the story. But it gives Kimmel reason to smile.

Since Grey's Anatomy has been almost totally same-sex scrubbed, the ABC series remaining with the gayest sensibility is the Thursday night mainstay Ugly Betty. Now, even that show is in some incredibly butch danger.

Steve Jobs, currently on medical leave as Apple CEO, is not dead, but the major networks are acting as if he were. Producers from CBS and NBC are scheduling interviews for their Jobs obituaries.

• Dark days at the Times: The newspaper's in "advanced discussions" to sell a "substantial portion" of its Renzo Piano-designed headquarters. [NYT]
• Disney is merging its ABC TV network with ABC Studios. [WSJ]
• WNET-Thirteen is cutting budgets and laying off staff. [NYO]
• In Style publisher Lynette Harrison Brubaker is leaving the company. [WWD]
• Katie Couric will go primetime next Wednesday. [NYT]
• The final inauguration ratings are in. [AdAge]
• Is Condé Nast just publishing the same story in its various magazines? [FB]
• The Tribune Co. has sold off the Cubs for $900 million. [Chicago Trib]

• Sarah Palin has tapped lawyer/agent Robert Barnett, who has brokered book deals for Obama and both Clintons, to help her score a deal of her own. [THR]
• MSNBC is thinking about adding a third show during primetime. [NYT]
• ABC is furious that it spent $2 million for "exclusive" footage of the Obamas' first dance, only to find out other networks were covering it, too. [NYP]
• Rumor has it Playboy is combining the staff of its website and magazine and moving the entire editorial operation to Chicago. [Page Six]
• The white power sent to the Journal yesterday was harmless. [WSJ]

The Inaugural Balls went on all night and it looks like Good Morning America's Diane Sawyer enjoyed the open bars. Thanks, ABC, for not pulling her off the air despite all this slurred nonsense.

Did McCain forbid Cindy from joining Dancing w/the Stars? [Pg6]

Drama and pissiness in the morning! A tipster tells us that some staffers at Good Morning America think a former executive producer ripped off their work to help get himself a book deal.

This little ad for Will Ferrell's new one-man show about GW Bush was banned from both ABC and CBS after outraged viewers decried its profane terminology. Bunch of D's. Watch it below, for freedom:

If you, like us, can barely endure a season's worth of Bachelor rose-distributions and Fantasy Suite-nailings to learn who absilicious father-of-one Jason Mesnick chose to be his lawfully contracted reality bride: we have exciting news.

• NBC's Lauren Zalaznick is forming a "panel" to help marketers target women. Just a few who have joined the program: Maria Bartiromo, Meredith Vieira, Candace Bushnell, Shelly Lazarus, and Tori Spelling. [AdAge]
• Hearst's Cathie Black is expected to sign a new 3-year contract. [NYP]
• The FT has let 80 people go. [Guardian]
• The first Madoff-related book, Catastrophe: The Story of Bernard L. Madoff, The Man Who Swindled the World, will be out in March. [NYP]
• ABC is thinking about bringing back Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. [TVW]
• Magazines like O, Glamour, W, Marie Claire and Teen Vogue all posted sharp declines in sales during the last few months of 2008. [WWD]
• The networks that went home winners at the Golden Globes. [Variety, NYT]

While Momma's Boys continues to advance the reality dating show genre in lightly incestuous ways, the stale Bachelor franchise looks to be growing desperate.

This week marked the debut of The City, the New York-centric MTV reality show that follows Whitney Port flitting around town with her fellow DVF "co-worker" Olivia Palermo. New York honored the grand occasion with a feature by David Amsden, who observed that Palermo isn't the only fixture on the social scene who has been in search of reality TV stardom. There's also Deborah Trachtenberg—otherwise known as Devorah Rose—the "26-year-old editor of Social Life magazine, who recently sold an idea (currently called Social Heights) to ABC about the lives of her and her close friends, the publicist Kristian Laliberte and diamond heiress Annabel Vartanian." Props to Devorah for managing to squeeze two lies by New York's factcheckers in the same sentence. She's actually 29, not 26. And the sale of that reality TV concept? Well, that came as news to ABC, who said they'd never even heard of the show.

Good Morning America was adorable this morning. And, judging by the dialog, still the gayest thing on the AM dial. Sam Champion and his highlighted lioness mane figured prominently, obvs.

Valkyrie-Opening Eve is days away, when children leave plates of strudel and wheat beer for Santa Claus von Stauffenberg, in the hopes they'll wake up to a Hitler-assassination the next morning.

Chalk up another victory for the creative class: ABC's obstacle-course competition hit Wipeout will return for two episodes on Super Bowl Sunday, directly challenging both NBC's halftime show featuring Bruce Springsteen and a special postgame edition of The Office. It's the biggest such counterprogramming battle in five years, and as with everything else pertaining to the network these days, the Peacock might be in trouble.

♦ Anna Wintour has responded to rumors she's leaving Condé Nast: "I have no plans to leave American Vogue now or in the foreseeable future." [NYO]
♦ Chris Matthews could be seriously considering quitting MSNBC to run for Senate. Or he could be using it as a negotiating tactic. [Politico]
♦ The Grammy noms were announced last night, in case you missed it. [AP]
♦ NBC has halted production of Knight Rider. [THR]
♦ More on the changes afoot at Random House. [NYO]
♦ ABC will air Homeland Security USA, a reality show produced in cooperation with the Department of Homeland Security, in January. Really. [NYT]

Because when it comes to melodramatic Lost promos set to the essential catalogue of The Fray—the soundtrack of our lives, really—too much is never enough, we bring you the seventh Lost trailer, featuring some rearranged footage you've already seen and that song you love so much! (This one doesn't actually feature the band, though fret not: We understand they do crash land on the magically reappearing island, where they are swiftly put to work putting out a subpar Nickelback single every 108 minutes—or everything will explode!) In case you've forgotten where we've left off last season, giant, swooshing intertitles helpfully remind us that "6 WERE RESCUED...THE REST...WE HAVE NO F&*%@ING CLUE BUT HOPEFULLY WE'LL GET THAT SORTED OUT." Needless to say, we're so there—hairy-chested Jack or not. [Lost]

Ted Koppel, the impressively-haired former ABC newsman, is parting ways with the Discovery network six months before his contract is up. You may or may not have been aware that he's been working with them since 2006. Not the greatest tragedy in history, but it does point to the sad plight of the former big-time news anchor. There's nowhere to go but down from the heights of the network news desk. Where are all those famous former anchors today?