Somewhere under the Southern Californian moon, midwestern gin fizz Allison Janney is having a dance party and if she invites you, Conan O'Brien, you'd be a real moron not to go.

After casually mentioning that she was going to reenact what is quite possibly her greatest contribution to modern television culture, Allison Janney did indeed make good on her promise to perform her iconic lip-synching of Ronny Jordan's "The Jackal" on last night's Arsenio Hall Show.

Paula Abdul's personal mantra is also her staff's. Adam Sandler is accused of dining and dashing. The cast of The Help likes to skinny dip. Angelina Jolie is "as kinky and insatiable as ever." TGIFriday gossip is titillating.

Whitney Jefferson — Last night after Modern Family, ABC premiered Matthew Perry's new comedy Mr. Sunshine. It was supposed to be loved by Studio 60 fans, a possible break in the "Friends curse," and most importantly—funny. So how was it?

It's upfront week when television networks show potential advertisers what they can expect for the fall season. ABC announced it's new lineup and CBS axed a slew of shows. Let the carnage commence!

Well, we finally got an answer to that question, huh? And it was... Nowhere near what most of us thought it would be, basically. Not unsatisfying, just strange. Strange and curiously religious?

Jack Dorsey, the creator of Twitter and the man you can blame for destroying your productivity at work, turns 33 today. Fashion designer Calvin Klein is turning 67. Meg Ryan is 48. Today show news anchor Ann Curry is turning 53. Former GE CEO Jack Welch is 74. Ted Turner is turning 71. Jodie Foster is 47. Restaurant-less chef Rocco DiSpirito turns 43. Model Daria Werbowy is 26. Actress Allison Janney is 50. WNYC president Laura Walker is 52. TV legend Dick Cavett turns 73. Jerry Sheindlin, the former People's Court judge and husband of Judge Judy, is turning 76. Former football player and sportscaster Ahmad Rashad is 60. And Larry King is 76 today, or just 24 years away from celebrating his centennial.

Mischa Barton heading into an Equinox with a friend ... Ed Westwick talking on his cell phone ... Kanye West hanging out with a friend outside the Jamba Juice in SoHo ... Linda Evangelista walking downtown with a bottle of water in hand ... Justin Long and Drew Barrymore playing football in Central Park ... Allison Janney shopping with her mom in Midtown ... Tyra Banks on location at the Ziegfeld Theatre for Gossip Girl ... Hilary Duff crossing the street with a bodyguard ... Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler riding in a convertible while filming a scene for The Bounty ... Bruce Willis crossing the street on the set of A Couple of Dicks in Brooklyn ... and Whitney Port sunbathing in Central Park.

Calvin Klein turns 66 years old today. Chef (and axed Dancing with the Stars contestant) Rocco DiSpirito is celebrating his 42nd. The Today show's Ann Curry is 52. Larry King may look 100, but he's (only) turning 75. Former GE CEO Jack Welch is 73. Ted Turner is 70. WNYC president Laura Walker is turning 51. Book publisher Julie Grau is 45. Jodie Foster is 46. Model Daria Werbowy is turning 25. Meg Ryan is turning 47. Sportcaster Ahmad Rashad turns 59. Actress Allison Janney is 49. Former Olympic gymnast Kerri Strug is turning 31. And TV legend Dick Cavett is 72 years old today.