Straight out of a Melrose Place marathon on Lifetime, Heather Locklear was at the center of a dramatic series of (Exclusive!) stories posted online over the weekend having to do with a phantom 911 call and alleged suicide attempts. Some said the call came from Locklear, some said her psychiatrist, and others said they didn't care. But as the workweek began and actual reporters took to the stage, it seems as though the story was nothing more than an overreaction to one in a sea of myriad false positives raging through the LAPD phone lines daily. So who started the hubbub in the first place? And was the call in question coming from...inside the house?