Forget you, Sasha Frere-Jones. The hip hipster face of music appreciation is now Quentin Tarantino. The onetime Idol guest judge was a Mentor to the kids last night. With, you know, predicatably disastrous results.
OK. Let's just get it out of the way: Didn't see that one coming! OK. That's over. Now, let's go on and discuss the elimination of Scott and hopefully not make any more terrible jokes.
What's so amazing that keeps us wannabe-stargazing? I mean, really. What is so amazing? This season is so bland and undercooked. And yet I keep trudging back, grumbling away week in, week out.
Bill O'Reilly did a segment on American Idol contestant Adam Lambert's apparent gayness last night, but actual photographs of two men kissing were too much for the old man.
Oh April Fools' Idol! You had no fooling. It was a traditionally brusque and quick and not-at-all-time-wastey affair, straight and to the point. Ha ha! April Fools! It was long and boring and stupid.
It was Top iTunes Downloads night on Idol! That means modern, hip, fresh songs, right? Songs like "Play that Funk Music White Boy" and "Surrender". Wait, what? Where's the Leona Lewis?
I think Motown is my least favorite of the Idol theme nights. The songs have all been sung too many times, they almost always sound dated, and it's racially embarrassing. Last night was no exception.
A kiddie update gets a release date, lawsuits are filed, quirky indies are cast with cult fave actors, Michael from The Wire joins the war effort, and people are watching Gary Unmarried.
• Lindsay Lohan is reportedly moving into a temporary "therapeutic environment" run by Stephen and Daniel Baldwin, where she can "go to work and meetings," and "remove the negative influences in her life." Sounds like the basis for a great sitcom, too. [Fox 411]
• Holly Peterson—socialite, daughter of billionaire Pete Peterson, and author of The Manny—is calling it quits with her husband of 15 years, Goldman Sachs exec Richard Kimball Jr. [P6]
• Whitney Port and actor Robert Buckley hooked up at a party in Miami and were later spotted "making out at Nobu." [P6, OK!, E!]
• Fashion editors: They're just like us! Vogue's Andre Leon Talley was spotted "chowing down on chimichangas at Chili's" at LAX on Tuesday night. [P6]
Well, that was unexpected. On last night's Idol elimination episode, twasn't Scott (as I predicted) or Anoop (as some of you did). It was blondie Alexis who went home. Wha' happened?
Country week is often the worst Idol theme night, because belting black ladies and barn-burning rocker grrls and fey dancepixie gays have a hard time twanging. This year's version went... actually, kinda OK.
So the judges now have one magical veto they can use just once. Deal with it, America! They didn't use it last night, though. So poor Jasmine Murray and Gloria Estefan were sent home, weeping.
The Wild Card round was decidedly not wild last night. We sorta knew that Anoop and Jasmine would go through, and Megan Joy wasn't exactly a surprise either. But that last one actually was!
The show that has entertained millions for so long has finally died, in this its eighth year. We mourn those who've been killed in this tragedy, and celebrate those who managed to escape it.
