As of tomorrow there will be no more Apple tablet rumors to swirl around and debate endlessly — the damned thing will finally be announced. In memory of the esteemed journalistic practice, here are today's final speculations.

On Wednesday, the president's first State of the Union address faces off against a geek's infomercial for absurdly expensive pieces of plastic. The jobless, broke, physically ill citizenry of this country is, naturally, way into the shiny plastic bits.

The New York Times Company is launching new "Reader Applications" division, according to an internal memo. This is probably the first corporate re-organization motivated by an external product that doesn't officially exist. The new business-side group will oversee products for non-Apple devices like the Kindle, Sony Reader and Barnes & Noble Nook. In fact, the word "Apple" appears nowhere in today's memo from Times Company president Scott Heekin-Canedy. But the timing of the announcement just days before Apple is expected to unveil its own tablet device is not lost on company insiders. We're guessing newsroom staff will be watching Apple's tablet event as obsessively as any Apple fanboys later this week, if only to get details on the "continued growth in this new and important segment of" Times business.

Supposedly speaking about the supposedly forthcoming Apple Tablet iPad, Steve Jobs was supposedly overheard saying: "This will be the most important thing I've ever done." Unless it makes snacks or transports people to booty calls, almost, but not quite. [TechCrunch]

The Jesus Tablet Blog recently uncovered documents deep within the US Patent Offices suggesting that the iPad was the Apple Tablet's name based on their battles against Fujitsu for it. Now they're moving ahead with a U.S. trademark battle.

The Apple tablet, whatever it's called, was indeed designed to help out the wheezing beasts that are print media and TV, according to the Wall Street Journal. They have some new details too.

Deep in the bowels of the Trademark Office is some fresh evidence that Steve Jobs intends to name his messiah machine the "iPad": the company is in a fight with Fujitsu over the trademark.

Don't have any info to enter in the Valleywag Apple Tablet Scavenger Hunt? You're in luck: Gizmodo is running a sweepstakes in which you can win one of Steve Jobs' messiah machines just by guessing its features.

The publisher, according to the Wall Street Journal, has been discussing enhanced e-books to run on the tablet that is all but officially in stores, if rumors/facts about a launch at the January 27th Apple event are to be believed.

On January 27, the president of the United States will outline plans for pressing issues like the deficit, immigration, maybe global warming. The same day, the CEO of Apple will hold up new, expensive plastic gadget. Who wins?

We have our first winner in the Valleywag Apple Tablet Scavenger Hunt! The most concrete proof of the messiah machine's existence so far landed in our inbox last night.

We've had enough of trying to follow all the speculation around Apple's impending tablet — how it'll work, its size, the name, the software and whether it will save magazines. We want answers, dammit! And we're willing to pay.

This is a pretty darn cool video from Time Inc. about its forthcoming tablet. Cool, that is, if you can forgive the gratuitous feature for fingering half-naked models.

Condé Nast says it is already racing to repackage its magazines for Apple's forthcoming tablet, starting with Wired, even while toeing Apple's line that the device doesn't exist. Publishers are clearly betting Steve Jobs can save their business model.

For all the hype about Apple's reportedly forthcoming tablet computer, there was a time when the company wanted nothing to do with the devices. That time lasted nearly 20 years, starting with this thing, the Pen Mac.

Apple needed music publishers to make the iPod a truly massive hit. Now Apple must work with its natural enemy — the press — to do the same for its forthcoming tablet. How painful.

Bill Keller may have casually mentioned that Apple's not-officially-happening-but-clearly-happening tablet computer is imminent and that the New York Times are working to bring content to it.

Amazon's a modern day Don Quixote. The company will expand its Kindle service across the globe, but won't look past the device's book-related origins. No touchscreen here. And, thus, no competition for Apple's forthcoming tablet. Silly Jeff Bezos! [Reuters]

They apparently imagine themselves as the rebel alliance in Star Wars, and Steve Jobs as Darth Vader, these publishers quoted in Ad Age. And they're determined to escape the iTunes Store tractor beam, a gorgeous Apple tablet notwithstanding.