athletes

Here's the Kate Bush Song That Was Cut from the U.S. Broadcast of the London Olympics Closing Ceremony

Rich Juzwiak · 08/12/12 10:38PM

Every once in a while, Kate Bush makes an appearance in pop culture, mythical creature that she is. Tonight was not an example of one of those appearances. She did, though, needlessly rerecord her only song to go Top 40 in the U.S., "Running Up That Hill," and give it to the Olympics so people could do weird things with their bodies, recreate some of her interpretive dancing from the video and build a literal hill along to a song that's really about gender-fucking. Also, there are montages of athletes, some of them weeping in defeat. In other words, this was a solid Kate moment, despite her predictable absence. (I believe she literally lives in a castle on a hill.)

Courageous U.S. Beach Volleyball Players Will Compete in Bikinis Even Though Shorts and a T-Shirt Are Totally Allowed

Caity Weaver · 07/27/12 10:30AM

The most vivid memory that the majority of Americans have of the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing, apart from the awe-inspiring opening ceremonies which will no doubt be bested tonight by the appearance of over two dozen Mary Poppinses, was that odd 40-day stretch in which women's beach volleyball was the only thing on television. Not the only competition being broadcast on the NBC Olympic channels. Not the only sport on all the sports channels. Literally the only thing being shown at any time on any channel, including HBO which is not even TV, it's HBO, was women's beach volleyball.

Soccer Player Regrettably Names His Son 'Trendy'

Lauri Apple · 11/08/11 08:55AM

Pity the little boy-child of Peterborough United player Gabriel Zakuani, who will have to go through life as "Trendy." Or at least the part of his life leading up to the day when he legally changes his name to something less humiliating—i.e., almost anything else.

Tom Brady Wears UGGs, Haha, Loser

Hamilton Nolan · 09/09/11 08:02AM

I bet the whole first half of this ad isn't even Tom Brady's feet. I bet he was like "Look, I'll do your UGG ad for a billion dollars but no way am I actually putting a pair of UGGs on my feet, even though I am the world's biggest metrosexual. That's not even manly enough for me, and look at my haircut." Also Mos Def changed his name immediately after doing the soundtrack to this ad, for obvious reasons.

Diana Nyad Ends Cuba-to-Florida Swim

Seth Abramovitch · 08/09/11 02:49AM

61-year-old marathon swimmer Diana Nyad cut short her second attempt to swim from Cuba to the Florida Keys about halfway through her planned, 103-mile journey. Her official Twitter feed tells the story:

Mike Tyson Calls His Belts 'Garbage'

Lauri Apple · 05/29/11 04:23PM

During an interview with CBS's Bill Whitaker, reforming (reformed?) former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson dismisses his title belts as "garbage" and "nothing." His priorities have changed! Making his kids and pigeons happy is what life's all about now—not golden, shiny things.

The Most Amazing Jump-Rope Routine You'll Ever See

Matt Cherette · 12/01/10 02:51PM

Behold the Kings Firecrackers, a jump-roping squad of teen (and pre-teen) girls from Ohio—who may get a movie deal! Here, the girls perform an astonishing eight-minute routine during a halftime show at the US Naval Academy. Watch inside.

Which Makes You a Better Athlete, Magic or Anorexia?

Hamilton Nolan · 02/04/10 05:32PM

Is magic the answer to our obesity problem? And if so, should we use that powerful magic to lose weight until we just shrivel up into a dessicated husk? And can we still play football? These and other questions, answered!

America Pursues Fitness Through Pseudoscience

Hamilton Nolan · 10/15/09 10:04AM

The only "news" topic Americans really care about any more is: Innovative ways to lose weight and become superhuman athletic "champions," in order to get sex. Alas, we only try to achieve this by scientifically repackaging snack foods. And perfume.