A total of 19 people died in weather-related incidents this weekend, after an enormous blizzard swept across the eastern half of the U.S.

There’s a blizzard coming! (Again.) People are freaking out! (Again.) And thank god for that. In situations like this, constant, irrational panic is your best course of action. Because do you know what happens to people who think everything’s going to turn out fine? Why don’t we ask a hungry little group called The Donner Party.

Well, well, well. New Yorkers lucked out last night and were spared the feared three feet of snow predicted to hit the city. Forecasts put our friends to the north and east as bearing the brunt of the storm, with 18 inches already recorded in Massachusetts—and plenty of snow still headed their way. Here's what you need to know today:

Have you gone to the store yet? You're working from home, right? Do you have extra batteries even though you do not own any battery-powered devices? Well, Jesus, get on it, because the "crippling," "historic," big-ass blizzard of 2015 is coming fast and furious and your mother is only concerned because she loves you.

Yo listen up if any of you know what a blizzard is please get in touch as soon as possible (ASAP) because I'm covering the blizzard live on CNN and I'll be god damned if I know what all this snow is about, really.

Mayor Bill de Blasio just announced that all New York City schools will be closed Tuesday due to the "crippling" blizzard expected to hit the Northeast U.S. sometime this evening. LIRR and Metro North services will end at 11 p.m., and limited service on NYC subways will begin at 11 p.m., though the MTA says extra trains are operating this afternoon to help with the pre-blizzard rush.

Big blizzard '15 is here and while outside might look quaint now, we're promised up to three feet of snow in parts of the Northeast. If you're home, go take a quick photo of your best, snowy view and share it with us. And then after tomorrow's dreaded pileup, take another shot and send us that one, too. We'll put them all together into a post-blizzard gallery.

No man from New Jersey to Maine will be safe from the blizzard barreling toward the East Coast. Anticipating the end of this world and the rising of a new society come Wednesday, many have stormed their local grocery stores to stock up. If you have not gone to the store yet, you are probably too late.

The sun is out over Manhattan now, after the darkness of the winter storm. Yet will the city ever recover? For the first time in decades, New York had to face frozen precipitation without the steadying hand of a right-wing authoritarian or a pragmatic technocrat as mayor. Now, as the New York Post has been warning us, the city is being run by a potentially feckless radical, who cares more about identity politics and fostering class resentment than the nuts and bolts of governance.

Another blizzard just touched down in the U.S., hitting the nation's midsection early this morning. After hurricane-force winds whipped through the Texas panhandle, the storm moved to Oklahoma and Kansas, cutting off power to thousands and closing highways. It's already claimed two lives: a 21-year-old man whose SUV hit an icy part of the road, and a bystander killed after 15 inches of snow caved in part of a roof.

The Northeast continues to dig out from Friday's massive blizzard, which now ranks among the top five largest ever to hit New England. 300,000 people are still without power while the death toll has risen to nine.

Good morning, survivors!

It's here! A huge snowstorm (which some—not me!—are calling "Nemo") is currently moving ominously across the Northeast, piling up feet of snow and rousing winds over 50 m.p.h. up and down the east coast. Here's the latest on the possibly record-breaking storm, from New Jersey to Maine.

As you may have learned from Twitter, or your phone, or just by paying vague attention to nearly any news organization: a big storm is headed for the northeast, bringing as many as 20 inches of snow to New York and more to New England. What do we know? What do you need to know?

Everyone's phone just made the same noise, because, well, you know why. (Actually—make of it what you will—Gizmodo's phones made the noise a couple of minutes afterward.) So let's acknowledge the fact that everyone already knows the thing that everyone is talking about. SNOW SNOW SNOW SNOW SNOW. Sometime. There.

A nor'easter hit the, uh, Northeast yesterday, like, October 29 yesterday, dropping as many as 19 inches of snow on a region stretching from Pennsylvania through New England in what was for most places a record-breakingly early snowstorm. Three people died overnight—an 84-year-old man was killed by a falling tree, a 20-year-old man accidentally touched a downed power line, and a third person was killed in a Connecticut traffic accident—and at least 2.3 million people were left without power.

After two months of searching and with the help of the entire internet, Todd Bieber finally found the owner of the roll of film lost in Brooklyn's Prospect Park during last winter's blizzard.

[Hundreds of cars were abandoned on Chicago's Lake Shore Drive overnight following a blizzard that made the road impassible. Image via Getty]