Under the guise of a program called "Books for the Troops," Bill O'Reilly strong-arms viewers into buying his latest bestseller by promising to send a copy of each one sold to American soldiers serving overseas. Of course, that doesn't mean the troops actually want the books, as we learned Wednesday when one serviceman in Afghanistan posted a photo online of scores of O'Reilly's Pinheads & Patriots burning in a trash bin. How rude! Thankfully, Stephen Colbert was at attention on tonight's Report to set the pinheaded troops straight.

Coffee marketers and morning-show hosts Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski are writing a memoir. Together. Because the fact that you see them on the TV together means that you want to read about them both at the same time! If you'd like to read about them separately, pick up Brzezinski's 2009 already written memoir All Things at Once and Scarborough's 2004 "part memoir, part political treatise" Rome Wasn't Burnt in a Day. Maybe this new one will have awesome sex scenes, or something.

What did the soldiers in Afghanistan do with those copies of Pinheads and Patriots your dad sent in a care package? They set them on fire.

There's a whole insane world of Lego enthusiasts out there. There's even a theme park devoted to all things Lego that opened in Florida a couple of weeks ago.

When young-adult novel Lauren Myracle found out that her gay teen hate crime novel Shine had been shortlisted for a National Book Award, she was "over the moon."

Let's say you're a woman who's worked hard, climbed the ladder, and risen to the very pinnacle of your profession—a historic achievement. You're taken seriously as a writer, a thinker, and a boss; you alone have the power to set the agenda for how many of our most important issues are covered by the national and international media. You have made it. Why—hypothetically speaking—would you not shut up about your stupid dog?

We've all heard members of the religious right rambling their silly, anti-gay slogan, "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve." Well, on this National Coming Out Day, God is coming clean and admitting they're wrong: He did, in fact, create Adam and Steve.

Steve Jobs's black turtlenecks helped make him the world's most recognizable CEO. But the Apple co-founder wouldn't have worn them if his employees had accepted the nylon jacket he proposed as a corporate uniform instead. Before he died, Jobs himself explained his sartorial signature to biographer Walter Isaacson, in an interview published for the first time below.

Break out your reading glasses and racial animosity: it's time for a very special alumni edition of Gawker Book Club! Patrice Evans is a current staff writer for Grantland and a generally accomplished writer online and off—you may know him by his alter ego, The Assimilated Negro. You may know him by his many pieces published on this very site!

Nicolle Wallace, a former George W. Bush flack whom the McCain '08 campaign assigned to Sarah Palin to help her get through the day without ruining everything, did not come out of that particular episode with the best feelings toward Sarah Palin!

The world's premier gambling event, the announcement of the Nobel Prize in Literature, happens on Thursday. Who's gonna win? Bob Dylan? (No.) Here are your betting odds!

Gawker Book Club is back! Today, we bring you an excerpt from Sad Monsters—an illustrated book of "humorous stories about the undead ... and the unloved"—written by Colbert Report staff writer Frank Lesser, and illustrated by Willie Real.

Courtney Love is writing a book! Or rather, a ghostwriter is being yanked from his bed in the middle of the night, shackled to a desk in an abandoned warehouse, and forced to whittle down 10,000 hours of scrambled spoken thoughts and profanity into something resembling a coherent sequence of ideas expressed in written words, i.e. a book!

International dramatic chipmunk Julian Assange had his ghost-written autobiography published without his permission last week. He got very angry about it! But it's a moot point, since nobody's buying it: Julian Assange: The Unauthorised Autobiography sold just 644 copies in its first three days on sale in the UK.

Bestiality advocate Malcolm Brenner—author of famed dolphin sex memoir Wet Goddess—is back in the spotlight!

Hopeless romantic Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to release his memoir next October—and according to his publisher, Simon & Schuster, the book is tentatively titled Total Recall: My Unbelievably True Life Story.

Perpetual shit-show Julian Assange has notched another screw-up in his long list of self-undermining failures: The much-vaunted memoir, for which he received a $1.5 million advance, and wherein he was to lay out for once and for all a defense against the malicious attacks leveled at him from all sides, is going to be published tomorrow against his will because he is an impossible human being.

The Rogue, Joe McGinniss' much-discussed gossipy book about Sarah Palin, hits stores tomorrow. But why wait an entire day to learn the most salacious news about Sarah and Todd Palin—and butts? We've got it for you now.

The print book publishing business was growing by huge margins and raking in ever-growing amounts of money—until now. Ikea has ruined it. Why do Swedish people love lingonberries but hate the printed word?

If you're some boring nobody with a pedestrian name like John Smith or Ann Jones (no offense guys!), it's no big whoop if some book publisher falsely attributes their fancy new pastry cookbook to you. But when you're famous and come with a name as exotic and memorable as, say, Florian Bellanger or Ludovic Augendre, and a publisher does that, then it's a very big deal.