Are you the type of person who buys experiences, or the type of person who buys things? You're the type of person who buys Funyuns. Yes, we know. But what you do with those Funyuns reveals whether or not you are a huge jerk.

In your odious Thursday media column: Russell Simmons has friends in low places, Virginia Heffernan's out at the NYT Magazine, Brandon Holley has literary plans for Lucky, and Demand Media will now take your money.

In your celebratory Wednesday media column: Brandon Holley makes it back to the magazine world, Tina Brown vows not to join the magazine world, Arianna Huffington's in her own world, and the WSJ's digital prez is out.

In your laughable Thursday media column: Roger Ailes calls for unity, Brandon Holley lives the lonely life online, W's editor is leaving, and so are some editors at Harper's.

Yahoo has installed Brandon Holley, the former editor of Jane, a women's magazine, as executive producer of Yahoo Lifestyles. This doesn't bode well for her career. When Scott Moore was put in charge of Yahoo's media operations, he said Yahoo would start focusing on mass instead of niche content — news, finance, sports, and maybe entertainment. "Lifestyles is the same — lots of subcategories don't meet the bar."

Brandon Holley, the last editor that Jane magazine would ever see (so sad! Still feel that hole in our hearts), did get a job it turns out! She has been secretly (well to us, not to her) working at Yahoo as "executive producer, Yahoo Lifestyles." This means that she is, for one of her duties, the astrology editor, which surely is a great and hilarious thing to edit. Like: "Can you make this totally-invented thing seemingly more accurate?"

Sad, if true, rumor: We're hearing that Jane magazine, which provided us so much joy with its coverage of boobs, has apparently folded. A call to Editor in Chief Brandon Holley resulted in our being informed that she was "in a meeting." Wonder what that might be about. UPDATE: The ad people just got back from a short meeting at which they were told the news. And as for the shuttering of the mag, Radar hears the same. UPDATE update: A friend hears from an employee: "It's done, everyone is packing up and has to be out today."

For the record, it was current Jane editor Brandon Holley who got hitched over the weekend in Virginia (update: actually, now we hear it was over last weekend) to musician John Deley, not Original Jane, AKA Jane Pratt, as "the gossip's gossip sheet" Jossip originally reported.

We were so sad when we read Brandon Holley's editor's letter in the famous boob-containing new issue of Jane. (They took pictures of ladies' boobs!) "Unfortunately, someone on the list (yes, we know who you are) decided to circulate the names of these women — which we intended to keep anonymous — to a Web site," Brandon wrote. We're just "a Web site!" Sad already. Also, we thought it was sort of shady (but admirably deft!) the way Brandon glossed over the whole "we accidentally sent out a list of everyone's contact info, complete with phone numbers, to all boob shoot participants" aspect of events. Anyway, she continued: "The blogger bragged about having the list and threatened to print it once our issue was out. The idea was to embarrass our volunteers and make them worry about being scrutinized." Bragged! Threatened! We so did not!

We're hearing that LA Times columnist, VH1 talking head, and general shanda-for-the-Jews Joel Stein will be doing a little bit of freelancing for Jane magazine. The story makes sense, in that Stein and Jane ed Brandon Holley once toiled together in the trenches of Time Out. Loathe though we are to see Stein's cut-rate Dave Barryisms in yet another publication, we can see one possible upside. Perhaps Brandon will mate him with the mag's professional virgin Sarah DiMuro, which would keep at least that corner of the gene pool quarantined.

At a gathering for 49 Nobel Prize winners in 1962, President Kennedy remarked that "I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent and of human knowledge that has ever been gathered together at the White House - with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone." All well and good, but this January 29th will see the greatest assemblage of magazine genius ever gathered together in the same room - with the possible exception of when Art Cooper had that fatal meal with Dave Zinczenko. That's right, it's MediaBistro's "Editors on Truth Serum — The New Rules of Success Now," a panel discussion at Chinatown Brasserie, starring such luminaries as Tom Foster (Men's Journal), Brandon Holley (Jane), Stacy Morrison (Redbook), Susie Schulz (CosmoGirl!), Richard Story (Departures), and Jake "Shake 'n Bake" Weisberg (Slate). As 'bistro Boa-in-Chief Laurel Touby puts it,

• Evil, Inc.'s Rupert Murdoch and Liberty Media's John C. Malone kiss and make up. [NYT]
  

It's that time of year again: Bleary-eyed Conde Nast editors turn out for the annual Christmas luncheon, and, middle-school style, determine their status by their closeness to (or distance from) Chairman Si. Conde Kremlinologist Keith Kelly gives you the scoop, but here are a couple of highlights:

• If you want to win in the end, you've got to indoctrinate them when they're young. [LittleDemocrats]
• Whitney Houston's sober, and you've got Courtney Love to thank for it. Now just imagine how that all came about. [Idolator]
• Why in the name of God is Men's Vogue hosting a slideshow of Francesco Vezzoli's Caligula? This really doesn't help their case. [Men's Vogue]
• The New Yorker pacifies toddlers and puts to sleep people of all ages. [Flickr]
• Giorgio Armani designs tomorrow's issue of the Independent, affectionately called the Red Issue. Just like his skin. [Independent]
• Only hipsters would upload a video with puppets singing about hipsters. [Animal]
• Murray's Hill: an imagined sitcom with music by the Fray, sponsored by Sparks. [Leveraged Sellout]
• Kanye West is many things to many people. Many Gay things. [One D at a Time]
• Jane editor Brandon Holley abandons punk roots, gets engaged. Mazel tov, ya sellout! [FishbowlNY]
• Sad news for fans of excellent British automotive television: Top Gear's Richard Hammond has been in a car accident. At 280 MPH. [Jalopnik]

As we suspected, Jane magazine is in fact having a competition to get a 29-year-old virgin laid. We could talk about how desperate and distasteful the whole thing is, but we're more upset that now we've got to cancel Gawker's Fuck a Fat Guy contest lest we be accused of appropriating the concept. No, what's more interesting to us is Sarah's appearance. She looks... familiar. Who is it that she reminds us of? Oh, right.

• Brangelina's stolen baby shower photos are such a national treasure, the freaking FBI will raid your home to get them back. Tax dollars at work, people. [TMZ]
• Mo Rocca is on Star's side: by blindsiding Barbara Walters and quitting ahead of schedule, she spared us all the two-hour farewell episode from hell. [Fanatical Apathy]
• The Devil's assistant wears Prada, too. And she's shitty at keeping your rolodex up-to-date. [NYP]
• Meet Sarah Stillman, the Nation's Student Writing Contest winner. She will only win $1000, however, because that's what she gets for leaning left. [The Nation]
• The sky over Gristedes bawls "like a fucking constipated baby." Shouldn't this sort of hate be reserved for Duane Reade? [The Call Me Concha]
• There's already a Generation Z, and they're fashion bloggers. [WWD]
• Jane EIC Brandon Holley feeds readers pizza, but not so much that they won't fit into pretty new clothes. [Jossip]
• Natalie Portman and Eddie Izzard are, oddly enough, neck-and-neck for the lead in Cabaret. Such a toss-up, right? [Suicide Girls]

Because we lurve Ashlee Simpson, we were recently flipping through the April issue of Jane (we know, we're behind on the girly mags), and we noticed a couple of things. First of all, it seems safe to say that after a few months under editor-in-chief Brandon Holley, Jane is pretty damn good. The look is fun, the edit is solid — just a good hipster-crafty-feminist revival.

• How'd People land the preggers-Angelina scoop? By donating something like $400K to one of the actress's favorite charities. "It is not a pay for access deal," says the mag's new chief. No, not at all. [NYP]
• Brandon Holley's Jane is kicking ass on the newsstand, it turns out. [WWD (second item)]
• Regret The Error's Craig Silverman is nitpicking because he cares. Yeah, us too. [Media Orchard]
• Thought Radar was short-lived? Behold Game Industry Report, which lasted for one day. [Folio:]
• It's not just Abramoff: Turns out the mag biz pay several firms about $500K each year to lobby lawmakers. [Folio:]
• With three jobs instead of his one old one, Ted Koppel really promises he'll be working less now. [WP]
• And Nightline vet Dave Marash signs on as Washington anchor for soon-to-launch Al Jazeera International, presumably only after Koppel decided three "retirement" gigs were enough. [Media Mob/NYO]

After all the stink we made about uber-editor Jane Pratt leaving Jane and being replaced by Brandon Holley, we still didn't really care enough to follow up and see how the "new" Jane would look (adult ADD, man). So we picked up the January issue the other day, and maybe it's too soon to tell, but we're not detecting any major differences, other than wee aesthetic ones, under Holley's reign. We did, however, notice an interesting little sidebar on the letters page, which was for the November issue (and Pratt's last):

So, uh, what the hell is going on over at Jane? Okay, what with Hurricane Zed and DeLay being indicted and Britney's new baby, we're sure the state of affairs at the girly mag is hardly at the top of your mind. But maybe it should be! After all, Keith "Mad Dog" Kelly confirmed our earlier report that since Jane Pratt stepped down from the helm at her semi-glossy brainchild, the Fairchild title has been melting off its staff like the fat on Star Jones. Speaking from Milan, new Jane EIC Brandon Holley comments that the recent departures (including managing editor Debbie McHugh) are normal for any regime change, and notes that new editors have already signed on.