• In what will probably come as soul-crushing news to Arden Wohl, Mischa Barton is launching a line of headbands with Stacey Lapidus. [WWD]
• How do you rope in shoppers during a recession? Staying open 24 hours a day is one popular approach. [WSJ]
• More bad news for retail: As if the recession wasn't painful enough, snowfall during the final days of the season is expected to make things worse. [WSJ]
• Just in case you missed the news, leggings are back. [LAT]
• Tim Gunn has sent out "videotaped personal pleas" to Giorgio Armani and Donna Karan to urge them to stop using rabbit fur from China. [P6]
• Betsey Johnson is not, in fact, planning a diffusion line. [NYM]
• Sorry, folks: Burger King's meat-scented body spray, is sold out. [Racked]

Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy is here! Half of you are like "GOD, I hate that nonsensical hack and his stupid storyline-lacking Family Guy." The other half of you lie, "Yea, me too." This new project doesn't hide the Burger King sponsorship, but these cartoon shorts actually fit MacFarlane's style better than the TV show; there's only time for one joke, so a storyline is a moot point. Seeing these things all over the web will only speed up the looming (unjustified) MacFarlane backlash, but we'll go out on a limb and predict: It will make him a(nother) shitload of money. The first two shorts are after the jump. Dogs and video games are the stars, naturally:

When Alex Bogusky, the ad guru for Burger King and Domino's Pizza (among others), announced last week that he is publishing a diet book, the general reaction was, "Ha, hypocrite Whopper-seller." An alternate theory, though, is that the book is part of some elaborate hoax, or will turn out to be the peg for a new Bogusky ad campaign. But if it is, he's doing a good job keeping it a secret; Burger King and Domino's, the two fatty food-touting clients most obviously affected by the book, had to find out about it by reading a news story:

Alex Bogusky, the it-boy ad wizard who thinks up all those Burger King commercials, is worried about America's fat ass! So he's writing a new diet book called The 9-Inch Diet. Oh sorry, we see that it's "not just another diet book." This one has added expertise:

Seth MacFarlane's plan to take over the internet is even grander than we thought. In June we told you about the Family Guy creator's new project, Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy, which will be an internet show syndicated through Google AdSense. Each episode will only be two minutes plus an ad, and he gets a cut of ad revenue, so he looked to be positioned to make a boatload of cash. But one single boatload obviously wasn't enough for the intermittently cool MacFarlane; he's going to do all the freaking ads himself: Burger King is the chief advertiser, and-in a cartoon marketing move the likes of which have not been seen since Homer Simpson started eating Butterfingers-MacFarlane will be creating the ads, like so:

Took me half a minute to realize this wasn't a legit Burger King ad. "Whopper Freakout, Ghetto Version" parodies the chain's "viral" ads, wherein they pulled the Whopper at one location for a day and taped people's reactions. In the version below, one customer says, "I hear you motherfuckers put worms in your burgers; I dunno if that's true but that shit is good." Chances are that's not the message Burger King wants spread, but some smartass in marketing must be high-fiving himself. Burger King has played with ironic advertising (the scary ads with The King, for example, and the classic subservient chicken microsite) enough to expect and appreciate this kind of parody. That sets them apart from General Motors, whose make-your-own-ad program inspired people to mock the gas-guzzling Chevy Tahoe. Amateurish, easily parodied virals are only for brands that can tolerate someone spitting in their burger.

NICK DOUGLAS — Can't say where I got this or how many years I'm disinvited from the Google Holiday Ball, but check out this all-hands memo from the co-founder and co-president of Google.