We hope we didn't miss anyone (please note we don't care about Kimora Lee Simmons)...at the moment, it looks like Andy Dick and Whitney Houston are clear of any drug-related court actions, but the day is still young.

We'll leave the dry analysis of what yesterday's Disney victory in the Hollywood Trial of the Century means for corporate governance and executive compensation to people with "real jobs" who "understand what happened." We're satisfied to focus on the semi-human reaction to the landmark decision, as delivered in a heartfelt statement read by the lawyer of the trial's central figure:

After Saturday's humiliating BB attack at the hands of Britney Spears and her sharpshooting entourage, the paparazzi really needed this morale booster:

The Hollywood Trial of the Century ended this afternoon in a Disney victory, with a Delaware judge ruling that while it certainly may have a been a pretty dumb idea for Michael Eisner to hire onetime "life partner" Michael Ovitz to help him run the Mouse, then give him a $140 million kiss-off 14 months later when the duo discovered that they would no longer cross a street to urinate on each other if they were engulfed in life-threatening flames, the nine-figure boner didn't constitute a breach of executive duty. Guess there's some kind of ten-figure threshhold where an "oopsie" becomes punishable negligence.

We know that your mind immediately jumped to Bobby Brown, but as wife Whitney might say, "Hell to the no!" Not this time, anyway.

The precedent has finally been set: Take pictures of Cameron Diaz's 19-year-old boobies, then try to sell the photos back to her with a forged release claiming you can take them to the highest bidder if she won't bite, go to jail. Young Diaz eroticizer John Rutter was convicted of forgery, attempted grand theft, and perjury today, ending the actresses's infamous "Sexy" Photos Trial and sending Rutter to prison for up to six years. As if to taunt the world with a description of the photos it will likely never get to see, the AP offers up a taste of what Diaz's $3.5 million might've bought:

Under the pressure of relentless cross-examination by the Cameron Diaz Legal Team, pre-fame Diaz mammary photographer John Rutter crumbled like a three-week old bag of cookies on the floor of a stomping convention, admitting that the now-famous signature on the Booby Model Release Form Heard 'Round The World might have been less than authentic: