Viewers of TLC's Sister Wives have just been robbed of a very juicy plotline: it was announced Thursday that Kody Brown and his four wives (listed in order of greatness: Meri, Christine, Janelle, and Robyn) won't be prosecuted for bigamy.

Miley Cyrus snaps at a paparazzo. Christina Aguilera returns to the scene of her public intoxication. Lindsay Lohan prepares for her big day in court. Brangelina's children "turn violent." Thursday gossip wonders what Lindsay Lohan will wear to court today.