American corporations that keep profits earned overseas can indefinitely keep that money out of the country in order to avoid paying American taxes. Former HP CEO and current John McCain campaign spokesperson Carly Fiorina says that gives companies an incentive to develop factories and jobs in markets abroad. Rather than close the loophole, Fiorina says it's better to lower the taxes. But then I have to ask, how will we pay for those wars overseas? I mean, besides slashing the social safety net and borrowing more money from China? The clip above is part of a longer interview with This Week with George Stephanopolous that ran yesterday morning. Her comments on McCain's environmental policy mirrored those made by the candidate at a whistle-stop in Oregon today.

Several scenes from one of the summer's most anticipated releases—Sex and the City: The Movie (can we just shorten that to Sex and the Movie already? We feel like an asshole every time we type it)—have been leaked online. [SPOILERS AHEAD!] In the sequence above, a subdued—oh, but we all know she's doing cartwheels in her head!—Carrie reveals to her best friends that Big has at long last overcome his aversion to her habit of talking with her mouth full, and finally proposed. We know, we know—this plot point is practically common knowledge by now, but it's another thing entirely to actually see Carrie come out and say it! Like Charlotte, the instant we watched it on our iPhones, we too erupted with an involuntarily squeal of delight that echoed across the walls of the brightly lit, Richard Meier-designed contemporary dining space in which we were power-lunching. It was totally embarrassing—but we didn't care. We only want the best for Carrie, and she just looked so happy. [Blackfilm.com]

For all the career renaissance we've seen from Alec Baldwin over the last three or four years, not even his Golden Globe for 30 Rock overshadows his legendary turn as "Sociopathic Father" in last year's wildly popular Web-exclusive release Thoughtless Little Pig. Even Morley Safer couldn't stop talking about it last night on 60 Minutes; in the accompanying video, watch the "appalling" Baldwin float like a butterfly and sting like a bee under Safer's withering sallies, punch back with word of his forthcoming book on "divorce and parental alienation" and finally score the knockout with his disarming rejoinder about a potential political career: "There's other things I want to do. I mean, in a matter of weeks I'm going to be 50... By 60 Minutes correspondent terms, I am a young man!" Oh, Alec, you bastard. We just can't stay mad at you. [60 Minutes]

Yeah, you already knew Fox News host Bill O'Reilly could be a volcanic asshole on camera, because he explodes at people all the time. But it's still fun to watch O'Reilly thoroughly lose his shit in this old clip from his Inside Edition days, which resurfaced on the Web tonight. You have to feel for whatever poor soul wrote the script for O'Reilly's teleprompter. Video — including the exclamation "Fuck it! Do it live!" — after the jump.

Hallmark invented a holiday, which means I have to take off early today (But I will be drunkenly seeking refuge here from my Mom's computer room after a few minutes of family time) so I leave you with something I dearly love. From The Larry Sanders Show: "The Egging."

Stopping by the heiress-friendly zone of the Ed Sullivan Theater to plug her latest exciting venture—MTV's So You Want to Be Paris Hilton's New Top Friend or whatever—the Hottie or the Nottie star admitted she had never seen an episode of that network's massively popular realitainment, The Hills. It was a pronouncement so startling—where else do people like Hilton turn to fill the long hours between hair-extension-launch press conferences and the next SLR-hotboxing or pole-rocking opportunity?—that it instantly called to mind her blanket denial of having ever engaged in drug use of any kind during her post-incarceration Larry King Live interview. While both statements seem highly unlikely, King responded by voicing his skepticism on a later broadcast, while Letterman instead chose to hang himself in his office by Brooks Brothers necktie 30 minutes after taping. [Late Show with David Letterman]

After only three days, the teaser trailer for Twilight — that highly anticipated franchise initially classified as the "new Harry Potter" — racked up more than two million views on the film's MySpace page. As industry insiders have noted, the vampire flick may break the record of 4.1 million first week views set by Indy 4 earlier this year. But after viewing Twilight's trailer for ourselves, we couldn't care less about records or the fate of Indiana What's His Name. Why? The folks at Summit Entertainment managed to create excitement (and widespread teen titillation) not by appealing to HP dorks or Narnia obsessives, but rather by going the Gossip Girl route and putting together an ensemble cast comprised of barely known and ridiculously hot actors. Take a gander at what appears to be a fantastical and surprisingly romantic Tim Burton-esque world after the jump.

Apparently there's only one script for viral ads on the Internet: Guy does small trick with product, guy does bigger trick with product, guy's friends tell camera, each other, bystanders and guy how awesome he is. There's always music in the background and you can always tell it's fake. I just explained how the same ad agency that did this for Ray-Ban last year just did it for Levi's; apparently Coors hired someone for a cut-rate version in this terribly staged YouTube "viral video" of Coors can tricks, shown below (along with a cute little parody).

My friends are blogging about this viral video of guys doing backflips into their jeans. So neat! So shareable! So worth the million views the three-day-old clip already earned! But I could tell instantly (and I have no idea why no one else did) that this was a stealth ad — because it's a direct copy of a stealth ad that got over 3 million views last year.

· Let's play "What If?" What if...Javier Bardem went a different way with Anton Chigurh, and chose to go the Felicity Huffman-in-Transamerica route? Click play to find out! [Fourth Grade Gladiators]
· Corey Haim is back! And he looks like a lesbian dogwalker. [TMZ]
· Here's the first seven minutes of Speed Racer. As Idolator Maura put it, "Watching this is like watching them set a giant pile of money on fire in slow motion." To which we add: But the flames and sparks are so colorful! [movies.yahoo.com]
· Yeah, we're with Nick Malis: We plan on staying home, and hitting Rainbow Road instead. [Malis In Wonderland]
· After a few hits from the corpse bong! [chron.com]
· And then we're hitting this: [ThingsIDidLastNight.com]

If you've not yet noticed, the media has been clogged with even more Barbara Walters than usual lately, the 78-year-old TV journalist and delightfully addled View ring referee doing overtime to plug her new memoir, Audition. (Defamer videographer and foremost Waltersologist Molly McAleer gives it three empty Hostess cupcake wrappers out of a possible four!) On last night's ABC tie-in special, Audition: Barbara Walters' Journey, Walters sat down with smarmy news anchor Charles Gibson for a one-hour trot down memory lane. (Sadly, it was trampled in the ratings by the bloodthirsty crowd who had gathered in Fox square to witness Jason Castro's dredlocked melon lopped off like a Rastafarian rugby ball.) Among her reminiscences, that default assignment for any young, ambitious journalist in the early '60s sporting a swell set of gams: a tour of Playboy Bunny duty, slinging buck-fifty cocktails and steaks while executing perfect Bunny-dips, all in the service of the fourth estate. Va-voom, Miss Walters. Va-voom! [Audition: Barbara Walters' Journey]

We've become just about as well-versed as we want to when it comes to the bizarre practices of Scientologists, which run the gamut from silent birth to e-meters. But after hearing that Katie Holmes' precious little Suri is still on the baby bottle even after turning 2 years old, and that fellow Scientologist mommy Leah Remini's "sweet witty pain in the ass" 3-year old Sophia still drinks six bottles a night, we discovered some disturbing tales from other members of the cult religion who used "Hubbard's baby formula," only to wind up with "thin and colicky" toddlers that had their "baby teeth destroyed" and "screamed themselves to death." But as the defiant Remini says in this clip, "I could see her drinkig a bottle 'til she's 16." More details on Hubbard's toxic formula that was developed using methods from Ancient Rome (!!!) after the jump.

It's over! The most consistently funny comedy site on the Internet is getting folded into AdultSwim.com. Turner is shutting down Super Deluxe and laying off most of its staff, according to paidContent.org. Now the original web content will get stuck with clips from Family Guy and Adult Swim's increasingly weird-without-payoff lineup. The good news: The guy below gets a TV deal.

John McCain's primary qualifications for the presidency are that he's old, he was tortured, and he's been a corrupt Senator for hundreds of years. Also he'd like you to know that he has a sense of humor, which is why he's The Daily Show's most-invited guest ever. On the show last night, McCain once again demonstrated how "hip" and "with it" he is by naming a character on a popular sitcom. One that is currently on-air, even! Not, like, Maynard G. Krebs or something. Jon Stewart desperately tried to get him to appear more presidential by making a joke he knew McCain wouldn't play along with.

Salvia: the legal drug that really works. Unlike most of the herbal fake-weed concoctions sold in the back pages of High Times, salvia is actually a powerful drug. As anyone who took one too many hits can attest. Now, New York state lawmakers are moving to ban salvia, with penalties of up to three months in jail for possession, and a year for distribution. And crazy kids have no one to blame but themselves; the state senator who proposed the ban "said he was convinced that the drug should be banned after he and his aides watched YouTube videos of people smoking salvia and having psychedelic experiences." Not so funny now, is it? Okay, it's still funny. The videos in question—which we've helpfully posted after the jump—mostly prove that salvia makes people do one thing very well: fall down.

· Today, an Oprah you simply cannot afford to miss: Watch as she, Gayle, Kelly Ripa's husband, and some other lady try to reach a consensus over when, exactly, Mariah Carey knew she was going to marry Nick Cannon. We know! We told you! [Oprah]
· Speaking of Mariah—just when it seemed her week couldn't get any better...[BBC]
· Gary Dourdan was officially charged with possession of heroin, cocaine and ecstasy, today. All of which he claims belonged to someone else. [Reuters]
· This just in! Amy Winehouse is out on bail after her recent drug-related arrest. She tried to claim they weren't hers, too, but Scotland Yard said, "No, no, no." LOL! [Guardian]
· Alan Rosenberg: The SAG talks have broken down. The livelihoods of thousands of working actors falls in your hands. So tell us...WHAT WAS MILEY THINKING?! [ca.reuters.com]
· The View is the catfight incubator that just keeps on giving. [Us Magazine]

Proving our hunches that we are indeed living in Bizarro World, last night Dina Lohan, master momager/pimp and bestest friend to all her angelic children, received an award naming her Outstanding Mother of the Year. As you'll see in this clip, a ceremony celebrating super-duper moms like Dina was held in what appears to be The Roxy: Long Island Chain, crowded with cleavage-baring mothers dancing awkwardly to techno beats. Naturally the question needing an answer pronto is: why Dina? OK! nabbed an answer from the group's spokesperson: "We're just honoring celebrities' moms on Long Island...It's a list of mothers from Long Island who have raised superstar children." And how did this kooky group of "Mingling Moms" come to the decision that Dina was The One? Their President's very Scientology-like answer, plus more details on Dina's tipsy date and how the Momager herself justified the honor bestowed upon her, after the jump.

Everyone's piling on Jerry Yang, saying Yahoo's founder-CEO needs to go. Why? The weak stock that provoked Microsoft's unsolicited bid may have been the result of his absentee ownership over the years. But Yahoo's deeper problem is the rot in its technical prowess. And that has everything to do with the quieter cofounder, David Filo. Filo has stayed behind the scenes, but wields considerable power over Yahoo's infrastructure. Requests for more hardware go through him, for example. When Yahoo executive Jeff Weiner joked in an internal all-hands movie about not going through IT because it was "too much paperwork," the audience surely laughed because they knew exactly what he meant.

After nightmare dater John Fitzgerald Page met Dr. Phil today there came a person we feel is in the running for "even worse worst person in the world": Paul Janka, the creepy deviant who masturbates before more uninterested women than Dov Charney, pens glorious odes to date-rape, and who famously went on depressing media joke dates with Moe and Kelly Kreth. While visiting Dr. Phil, Janka apparently just perved on the staff.

So. Remember this? Online Dater John Fitzgerald, the worst person in the world, was going to be on Dr. Phil, the worst show in the world.Why? We are not really sure. It aired today! Dr. Phil copied his drivers' license—even his drivers' license is creepy—and discovered the horrible truth: John Fitzgerald Page is almost 41. Then they sent him to a bar, where he terrorized women and wore suspenders. "He needs his own table, really, for his head," said one lady. IT GOT WORSE. MUCH, MUCH WORSE.